Chapter 338: I’ll Give You A Chance!
Chapter 338: I’ll Give You A Chance!
Translator: Nyoi-Bo Studio Editor: Nyoi-Bo Studio
"Strange, wasn't the stinky tofu square-shaped? Why are there sausage-shaped ones as well?" The Eighth Elder paused and pondered. He was also wondering if these pieces of 'stinky tofu' had just been made.
Slurp!
The Second Prince sucked the black thing into his mouth, closed his eyes and started to chew.
Immediately, he gave a frown and asked, "Uh? Isn't it supposed to be tasty and flavorful? Why do I feel like it is dry, hard and still smells fetid?"
"That's really strange. Mine tastes exactly as you described it, your royal highness!" the old eunuch beside the Second Prince concurred, puzzled as well.
A prince who was opposite them disagreed, "no, I personally fel that this is really delicious, especially the texture. It's crispy outside and tender inside. When chewed, the tofu bursts inside the mouth together with its juices, and it actually starts to smell good!"
"This prince also has the same opinion. This is really tasty. It feels like tofu, but also a hundred times better than tofu!"
"Yes, and it increases our Soul Strength! This is too amazing!"
"Ah? You sure? Why is mine dry and hard and so hard to chew? It is unusually bad-smelling and I feel disgusted by the stinky smell!"
"Exactly! Not only that, but I feel like puking already. What is going on?"
...
The princes were baffled. Some had tasted the real stinky tofu but others had had a taste of Buttface's stinky poop!
Xu Que and the Seventh Princess stood a little away from the crowd.
When he saw the scene play out, he tried very hard to control himself from breaking into laughter. He was on the verge of collapsing on the ground and laughing all he wanted.
These people sure are into strong flavors, they actually ate Buttface's poop, he thought.
Kudos to all of you! Buttface has been sealed in the stone wall for ten thousand years and has never pooped since then. It is most unexpected… that his fresh poop is now eaten by these princes!
"This is not right!"
The Eighth Elder of the Sky Incense Valley felt something amiss and quickly went over to the pot of oil. Instantly, he had a weird expression on his face. He pointed to the pot where there were now only a few pieces of the sausage-like thing left, and asked Buttface, "little dog, I would like to know what this thing is?"
"Bah, damn! You are the dog, your whole family are dogs! This deity is clearly a wolf! Just look at how great and domineering this deity is!" declared Butfface, proud and aloof. "As for this thing, heheh, it has a great history!"
"A great history? I'm willing to hear about it."
The Eighth Elder looked grim. He didn't flare up on account of Xu Que, having seen that Buttface knew Xu Que.
The rest of the people looked towards Buttface, especially the princes. When they heard Buttface claim proudly that the black thing had a great history, they couldn't help but feel excited, and thought that they might have gained much more from eating that thing!
"I had never imagined that after ten thousand years that the world would have changed so much. Humans have started to eat sh*t, and it can actually sell so well!"
Buttface was filled with emotion. He felt the world had changed greatly. However, he still wore an aloof expression and continued, "fortunately, this deity has acted for the greater good and has released my 10,000-year-old wolf poop so as to sell it to all of you, as much as it pains me. It's 10,000 taels a bowl, too worthwhile!"
Poof!
A few princes instantly puked out everything that had been inside their mouths. Their faces were pale and greenish from hearing what they had just heard, and they almost puked out blood.
Wolf poop?
Fuck! This dog actually 'released' its own poop inside the pot?
This is f*cking genuine sh*t?
...
The Eighth Elder from Sky Incense Valley was dumbstruck, wearing a disbelieving expression.
Soon, he flew into a rage. Shaking in anger, he pointed at Butfface, voice trembling. "You… you've ruined this! What a waste! This is a pot of priceless stinky tofu. And you actually threw dog poop inside it?"
"Crap, this is wolf poop! Wait… what did you say? That boy made stinky tofu? It was not… sh*t?" Buttface suddenly realised what was going on and stared upwards with his big round eyes.
The Seventh Princess was horrified when she recalled that she had also eaten stinky tofu earlier. Her face changed abruptly from an expression of calm to one of fear. She felt like vomiting.
Fortunately, she remembered that Xu Que had prepared her bowl before Buttface had poured dog poop into the pot of oil, and her bowl had therefore been uncontaminated.
She heaved a sigh of relief.
"Princess, don't you want to drink tea? Go, go, go, let's go for a walk!" Xu Que could sense that a fight was about to break out soon. He held the dainty hand of the Seventh Princess and ran away from the scene.
"Eh… Young Master Xu, this… this…"
The Seventh Princess was about to ask Xu Que if he knew what had happened. But when he held her hand, she became flustered and her head immediately went blank!
Having been born as a princess, she always watched her behavior and was often reserved. She hardly even talked to a man more than required, let alone let one hold her hand!
Now that Xu Que was holding her hand, for a conservative princess like her, she could not believe what was happening and felt very nervous.
"Owww!"
At this time, Buttface's howling was heard.
It was followed by the angry voices of the princes berating the dog. Soon, the crowd became infuriated and the situation spiralled out of control.
"Xu Que! You actually dared to deceive this deity? You're finished… ahh, ow, ow, ow, ouch! Why are all of you hitting me? Do you have the guts for a one-on-one? This deity is invincible and is raring to go for a one-on-one challenge… Oww! Outrageous, this is outright bullying! How can you call yourselves heroes when all of you have come at me together? Don't force this deity to fight, otherwise you'll regret it for life! This deity has killed people before! Damn it! Still bashing me? Do you know that if this deity gives a command, there'll be millions of wolves surrounding this Imperial City in an instant? Besides, what's wrong with eating this deity's poop? It has been my treasured collection for 10,000 years and the ingredients are fresh! Oww… ow, ow, ow, ouch!"
...
As they ran into the street, Xu Que could vaguely hear Buttface's angry snarls, and felt elated.
Although he knew very well that the people definitely wouldn't be able to hurt Buttface, Xu Que was still glad to see Buttface getting bashed and chased around.
However, right now, he didn't want to be a part of the crowd, and had fled the scene with the Seventh Princess!
Running away after acting tough was definitely exciting.
But running away with the most beautiful girl there after acting tough… that was undeniably cool!
Whenever such scenes appeared in movies, it would be a most dashing scene for the protagonist!
Xu Que didn't have any thoughts other than purely wanting to gain more Acting Tough Points. So he was very dedicated, always making sure to act coolly in front of others!
As they ran, they passed by a tavern that had yet to close for the day.
Xu Que stopped for a moment as he suddenly felt like drinking some wine.
This was because he had just eaten the chicken wings and stinky tofu, and having some wine would cleanse his palate.
"Princess, why don't we have some wine instead of tea?" he suggested to the Seventh Princess, who had not yet recovered from her shock.
The princess tried to calm herself down and although her veil covered half her face, Xu Que could tell that she was nervous and shy.
"Young… Young Master Xu, it's getting late, why don't we…" She pondered for a while, deciding to meet up tomorrow.
But Xu Que quickly interrupted her. "Princess, that's not right. As the saying goes, 'if you don't drink at night, you've lived your life in vain'! Come on, let's have a bottle of wine. Didn't you want to find out about my identity? I'll give you a chance, let's go!"
Xu Que stepped into the tavern.
...