The Silly Alchemist

“…You’re the odd one, couldn’t you tell…” said the seventh princess, but she was interrupted by a laughing Ye Lanyu before she could finish.

“Shut up! Brother, let me ask you, have you both done -anything- while you were with Alvin?”

“No, he has always kept his distance. Perhaps because he’s half-elf,” said Ye Lang, shaking his head.

“Too bad,” said Ye Lanyu, a little disappointed.

“What too bad? Ye Lanyu, I’m warning you, don’t ruin Ye Lang with your filthy mind!” roared the seventh princess as she pulled Ye Lang closer to her.

“What? He’s worse than me, alright? He went to the brothel when he was five,” Ye Lanyu pulled Ye Lang back.

“…” Alvin and the rest fell silent. Five…

“?? What are you talking about?” Ye Lang was very confused.

“You’re slow. It’s been so long, and you didn’t know?” Ye Lanyu shook her head, smiling.

“Ye Lang, you’re so cute!” the seventh princess hugged him and gave him a light peck on his face.

“??”

He was very confused. What were they talking about?

“Mother, what are they talking about? I don’t understand?” Chen Pi and Ye Lang were both very confused.

“My child, this nice elf is a lady, she’s not a man,” said the old woman.

Chen Pi was shocked, muttering, “What? A lady?”

“Who’s a lady? Alvin?” Ye Lang regarded Alvin from head to toe after hearing the old woman.

Ye Lang shook his head, “Well she’s definitely not talking about you.”

“…”

Everyone fell silent again. The confused genius doctor was confused indeed.

“Why definitely not me?” Alvin looked at Ye Lang, feeling wronged.

“Yeah, little brother, why do you think she’s not?” asked Ye Lanyu curiously.

“Look at him, he’s so skinny, and he doesn’t have a chest. He doesn’t look like a girl at all,” said Ye Lang pointing at Alvin.

“…” Alvin covered himself immediately, blushing through his tanned skin.

“You’re stupid, what are you saying? Girls must have huge breasts?” Ye Lanyu knocked his head.

He thought for a moment, then as if suddenly understanding something, “Ohh, I know! Some girls are flat so this is quite normal! Come to think of it, if Alvin had a little more in the chest, he would look a lot like a woman.”

He continued, “Your eyes are so pretty, your skin so smooth. You’re tanned, you look very healthy. It’s alright if you don’t have a chest, it’s all the same!”

“I do, please stop talking about it!” Alvin was upset now.

“…” Ye Lang gave up trying to see.

“…” Alvin was speechless.

“Alvin, why didn’t you say earlier? That you were a girl?” asked Ye Lang.

“Do I need to tell you…”

“Why not?”

“No!” This wasn’t Alvin’s answer, it was everyone’s answer. Everyone could tell Alvin was a girl.

Not just Ye Lanyu and the seventh princess, everyone who’d met Alvin very quickly knew that she was a girl half-elf. Not a man!

“You all know?” asked Ye Lang.

“Yep, we do,” everyone answered once again.

He immediately asked, “If you all knew, why didn’t you tell me?”

Everyone fell silent for a moment.

“Because we thought you knew!!”

Yep, everyone thought Ye Lang knew Alvin was a girl. It was too obvious. Perhaps it wasn’t obvious while they were fleeing their village, but after everyone had to change their clothes around each other, they knew.

The way Alvin walked close to Ye Lang, they thought Ye Lang knew so no one thought to tell him.

And everyone was sure now that Ye Lang was VERY clueless. He was so clueless he hadn’t noticed something so obvious. And Alvin had been with him for so long!

It was too kind to call him ‘clueless’, he was SLOW!

Ye Lang still didn’t understand. He peered suspiciously at Alvin, “Which part of you looks like a girl? Why can’t I tell?”

Many girls can be distinguished by their voices, but Alvin had a raspy voice so Ye Lang couldn’t tell. He still didn’t know how everyone knew.

“That’s because you’re dumb,” she sighed, “also, I’m Arwen, not Alvin!!”

“Oh,” he looked like he understood, but he asked, “Is there a difference?”

“..”

“Alright, you being a girl makes everything much easier. You’ll be handling all the females from now on,” Ye Lang didn’t care. Male or female, it didn’t make a difference to him.

“I’ve always been handling them,” said Arwen softly.

“Next…” Ye Lang continued with his consultations.

Arwen also continued to be Ye Lang’s assistant, it didn’t make a difference to her either. Other than Ye Lang not knowing she was a girl, everyone already treated her as a girl anyway.

She did think Ye Lang knew, for no matter how clueless, he should. She didn’t expect this at all.

If it weren’t for that honest punk Chen Pi, looks like Ye Lang would’ve never known.

As for her chest, it wasn’t like she used a binder. It was… naturally that way. You couldn’t say she had no breasts, she just had very small ones.

And this incident passed without an issue. This was also odd to everyone else. Ye Lang’s response was so lacking- looks like he really didn’t care if anyone was male or female.