Chapter 581: IT'S SO DAMN HARD!
He knew himself too much. That’s why he told himself before this meeting that he would only focus on getting Astrid’s forgiveness. He hadn’t thought there would be none to seek. He didn’t even have to plead. Astrid just very easily told him that he liked him.
And now, the other was telling him that he could call Emmy. He lowered his gaze, biting his lower lip. He wanted to say ‘no need’, but he couldn’t. How could he, when deep down all he wanted was to hear his sister’s voice again?
Astrid was giving him that opportunity now.
He went here with just the simple thought of getting forgiveness and nothing more. How could he ask for more in his position? That would be too shameless. He might be thick skinned at times, but this was not that time.
But who knew that Astrid would actually give him so much more than what he’s asking? Giving him such a big gift?
After asking that question, the other didn’t say anything more. As if waiting for him to make his decision.
His internal struggle didn’t last long. He raised his head, his eyes brimming with determination and maybe a bit of anticipation. But there was also fear hidden beneath all of that.
“If- if you’re sure, then I want to speak with Emmy.”
Astrid smiled at that. He thought Casey would refuse. If the other did just that, he was prepared to convince him. After all, even if his mother didn’t say anything when he talked to her earlier, it was obvious that she also wanted to speak with Casey. As evidence of how his mother told him to video call her again if Casey asked if he could speak with her.
He took off his Terminal before opening it. He swiped on the virtual screen until his mother’s Terminal number appeared. Then he turned his Terminal around so the screen would be facing Casey.
“If you’re ready, just click on the call button,” he said before standing up. “Then I’ll leave you to it.”
Casey suddenly panicked. “Wait–!”
Astrid stopped his action of opening the door. He turned to look at Casey.
“Can you stay?” the other asked. “Please?”
Astrid raised his brow. He thought the other would prefer to talk to his mother in private. It’s their two decade long reunion, after all. Even if it was just through a video call. But surprisingly, Casey wanted him here. He could only conclude that the other was too nervous to talk to his mother alone, and he needed some kind of mental support.
That’s why he wanted him to stay.
Astrid nodded. “Okay.”
Casey visibly sighed with relief when he saw Astrid sat down opposite him again. Then he looked at the virtual screen in front of him, particularly at the profile picture with the name ‘Mom’ underneath it.
It was just a small profile picture, but he couldn’t take his eyes off of it. A woman with ice-blue hair was smiling happily at the camera. Her sapphire blue eyes crinkled like a crescent moon. One could see how happy she was when that picture was taken.
Had he ever seen Emmy this happy before? The answer was no. Maybe when their mother was still alive. But Casey was still too young back then to remember it.
He suddenly felt uncertain. Was this really the right decision? What if his presence disturbed Emmy’s current peaceful life? Then, should he really do this?
Seeing Casey’s sudden hesitation, Astrid decided to give the other a little push. “Go on, Uncle Casey. As I’ve said earlier, Mom would also be glad if she could speak to you. So, don’t think of anything unnecessary. Just think about what you really want to do at this moment.”
Casey didn’t expect for Astrid to encourage him like that. A sweet pang suddenly hit his heart. Really, what a good kid. Because of his nephew’s words, he felt a bit confident and his hesitation disappeared a little.
Taking a deep breath, he finally pushed the ‘call’ button.
One… two… three–
The call was connected and the person he most want to see this past two decades finally appeared on the virtual screen.
Emmy’s ice-blue hair was tied in a loose bun. She was also wearing some kind of hat that seemed like one of those worn by farmers. There was even a bit of dirt on her cheek. Her current appearance was far from the glamorous young lady she once had been. But she looked very healthy. And more importantly, happy.
As Casey was observing Emmy, Emmy was also doing the same.
She looked at her grown brother. The silver hair and sapphire blue eyes were still the same as she remembered. But the image of the person on the virtual screen was very different from the one in her memory. In her mind, Casey was still that mischievous boy who had a lot of energy. But now, now…
“You’ve become really handsome,” she said in a hoarse voice. “Casey.”
The frozen Casey who could only stare at the virtual screen finally came back to his senses.
“E-Emmy,” he called back. The tears that he had been holding back since earlier finally fell down. “I- I miss you.”
After he said that, it’s like a dam had been opened. All the emotions he had been keeping to himself just poured out.
“I miss you so much. When- when they told me that you’re gone, it’s like- it’s like the ground I’m stepping on just caved in. I didn’t know what to do with myself. Everything is just so painful. Waking up felt like a chore. I just want everything to end.
It’s so hard. It’s so damn hard!”
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