The Empress’s Gigolo

Ren Baqian immediately understood when Caretaker Shi explained it.

Occupation: Empress. Strength: world number seven. Wealth: As rich as the whole nation. Appearance: Alluring fair skin and mind-blowing beauty. No matter where she went, she would still be the fairest and wealthiest beauty of all.

Someone trying to go after the empress would then be a very normal occurrence.

Therefore, on the empress’s birthday, there would be many wealthy and powerful men or well-wishers from the three countries rushing to Dayao. Each and every one was like a passionate animal trying to gain the favors of the empress.

Because, this was the only time they had the chance to get near the empress.

Ren Baqian also understood why the empress chose him to provide assistance at the reception. After all, these people were bearing gifts, and she couldn’t expect them to stay at the guest inn. Arrangements had to be made as a gesture of goodwill, and the ruler of the nation also had to save her own face.

Even though these people were here to present gifts to Her Majesty, some of them certainly annoyed the empress, and she had already wanted to slap them for a period of time. For some reason, she did not mention much about this matter and, therefore, briefly said a sentence about it.

The reason was very clear. In any case, they could not disgrace Dayao.

This phrase was rather vague. What was regarded as throwing Dayao’s face?

If you let an aboriginal take on this task, he reckoned that whenever poetry was discussed, the aboriginal would compare the size of their fist? And if they talked about beautiful sceneries, the aboriginal would compare the thickness of their legs?

After all, this was Her Majesty’s birthday, and precautions must be taken to prevent any serious injury from occurring.

As a result, a “talented person” like Ren Baqian who suddenly appeared in front of the empress, was caught as someone capable of assisting her. She did not even care whether he was up to standard or not.

In any case, it was the same every year. Ren Baqian reckoned that no matter how bad he was, the result could not be worse than the previous year. He might as well put himself upfront.

Thinking about the people who might come, Ren Baqian guessed that it would probably be the young elites from various countries. Those with no confidence at all absolutely had no probability of coming. The empress actually bestowed him with the authority to suppress these people?

Ren Baqian felt that it was already not bad if they did not suppress him.

If he did not handle them properly, they would take him for a tool or stepping stone to show off.

In an instant, Ren Baqian did not feel good anymore.

Upon thinking over what the empress had said, Ren Baqian felt that if he were to become a stepping stone, he was afraid that the empress would make him a stepping stone his entire life. The kind of stepping stone which was used to fill holes and buried under.

Thinking about such an outcome…

“Damn it, I will fight it out with them,” Ren Baqian said with a murderous intent.

“What are you fighting against?” Caretaker Shi raised his head looked at Ren Baqian blankly.

“When is Her Majesty’s birthday?” Ren Baqian asked.

“There’s still one more month, probably?” Caretaker Shi said with uncertainty. “How did Her Majesty come to mention about this today?”

“Her Majesty asked me to accompany her to receive the guest at the reception,” Ren Baqian complained.

“Haha, receive the guests then. Just arrange good accommodation for them, and it will be fine.” Caretaker Shi said nonchalantly.

“Her Majesty also said that we cannot throw Dayao’s face.” Ren Baqian showed resentment.

“Isn’t it simple? Beat up those who are discontented and those that look at you in a displeasing manner. Also, beat up those whom you find an eyesore. Beat all of them up till they can’t even open their mouth to speak.” Caretaker Shi burst into a loud laughter.

Ren Baqian let out a faint sigh. As expected, this was the style of the aboriginals.

Better not say such, as Ren Baqian might actually need to bring along two fighters. In this world, it was not only the aboriginals who can fight. If the empress hadn’t Long Wanli’s opponent, Ren Baqian reckoned that Long Wanli could have showed off a bit of his skills.

Ren Baqian bade goodbye to Caretaker Shi and went back to his room. The two little chaps were hugging each other and sleeping soundly. Ren Baqian dived into his bed and started to ponder.

The status of the people coming was known.

Anyway, no matter how awesome they were, they were certainly not as awesome as the empress.

Each person’s ability could be measured according to extraordinary martial art skill, literary talent, eloquence, and physical appearance.

Apparently, those with extraordinary fighting capabilities would not be able to display them.

In any case, they cannot compare with the prowess of the empress.

There are only six experts in the world that are stronger than her, and he assumed that they will not come.

After all, the masters know how to maintain their own status, and they would not behave like an old cow eating the young tender grass?

As for those people with extraordinary literary talent, the empress deliberately mentioned their poetic and singing skills.

The empress’s intention was for himself to suppress this bunch of people.

Dayao only produced a very few literary talents. This bunch of people came every year to Dayao to flaunt their talent and had already annoyed the empress since a long time ago.

Ren Baqian thought for a while. If every doctorate holder or professor had nothing better to do every day than only bragging about their profession, he would definitely not respect them like the endless surging water. Rather, he would feel like using the sole of his shoe to slap their faces.

He reckon that the empress would feel this way too.

How did that phrase “The minister is worried when the king worries. The minister would rather die than let his monarch be humiliated.” come about? Although he was a twenty first century person, his superior now was the empress. The empress could slap their faces with a sole anytime she liked, and he would be the first one to carry out the mission.

After coming to an understanding, Ren Baqian had a little more clarity on the situation.

Although these people were the elites from different nations, he was a university graduate and, in any case, should not lose out to the elites in a feudal society.

Oh, I still have some time.

The next time I return to Earth, I will memorize three hundred poems each from the Tang Dynasty and from the Song Dynasty.

I do not believe that the wisdoms of the ancient civilizations cannot surpass the knowledge of the elites from the renowned families.

Although my knowledge of mathematics will make their eyes pop out, I’m afraid, however, it would be like a chicken talking to a duck which is quite meaningless.

The next day, Ren Baqian arrived at Qingxin Palace Hall and looked resentful after seeing Lin Qiaole. He wondered whether he should bring feces smelling like chocolate or chocolate-flavored shit the next time.

“Why are you looking at me in that way?” Lin Qiaole saw Ren Baqian’s grudgeful face and said awkwardly.

Ren Baqian thought for a moment and decided it was better not to say anything. A gentleman should not be too calculative with a little girl or else people would find it very eye pricking.

No doubt, he was indeed quite petty.

He made up his mind, and it should be chocolate-flavored shit.

The other party was not stupid and would certainly not eat a chocolate which smells like shit.

“Let’s continue.” Ren Baqian pulled a stool and sat directly across from her. Lin Qiaole was relieved when he did not say anything. She was a little nervous just now and was baffled by this feeling as well.

Ren Baqian learned a few dozen words in one afternoon and reviewed what he learned at the end of the day. He was quite satisfied that he did not forget any words. Ren Baqian was perfectly contented with himself.

That evening, he went to the palace to tell the story as usual and brought along a bag of White Rabbit Creamy Candies. The empress was quite happy with Ren Baqian for he knew how to get into people’s good books and was looking more pleasing to her eyes.

The bunch of stout and rough people in the imperial court could easily lead an army to fight, but, it was hard for them to be sensible and considerate.

The story began with the birth of Ne Zha, the evisceration of his bones to show gratitude to his father. Following which, he talked about the lotus incarnation, Jiang Ziya venturing down the mountain, and also the burning of the Pipa Spirit slowly unfolded. The story got increasingly interesting as Ren Baqian continued.

Even the empress seldom interrupted and concentrated on listening to the story. From time to time, she put a big piece of White Rabbit Creamy Candy in her mouth,

One person spoke and three people listened while the firelight in the palace flickered in the wind at times.

Ren Baqian suddenly felt that the atmosphere was quite suitable for telling a ghost story.

He decided to put this idea quickly to rest when he recalled the fighting prowess of the empress.

Other women were afraid of listening to ghost stories and acted like scared little birds. It was alright if the empress wasn’t scared, but if she got really scared, she might slap him and send him flying. Then, the same date next year would be his death anniversary.

That night, the story of the Investiture of The Gods went on later than usual, but the empress did not say anything. Ren Baqian continued to narrate until the part where Bo Yikao went to send tribute to Chao Ge and finally landed up in jail. Only then did the empress decide to let him off.

The next morning, Ren Baqian took Teng Hulu and Tie Dao out for a walk. After he returned to Earth tonight, it would be Chen Qing’s engagement the next day. He was looking to buy some nice gifts for Chen Qing.

Even though Ren Baqian was aware of the scarcity of products in Dayao, it was only after he went to some shops on Jingyang Road that he realized that it was worse than he expected.

Most of the things in the shops were refined rice and noodles, wine, salt, cloth and other necessities of life. Furthermore, the prices were not low.

There were a few shops which sold brightly colored cloth, silk ,or porcelain, and so on. However, the prices almost made Ren Baqian burst his blood vessels.

His original intention was to get a gift for Chen Qing, but after going around for half a day, he could not find anything suitable.

Seeing it was time to go back, he reluctantly did so.