Otherworldly Evil Monarch

~ The Imperial Palace~

After that thundering voice, a ‘Bang!’ sound was heard, and then a huge body came flying out of the door. The fat on the body vibrated as it slammed into the wall on the opposite side of the waiting room, and then dropped to the floor below with a ‘pop’ sound.

Simultaneously, an unspeakable stench filled the room…..

That body was Tang Yuan’s!

But at the moment, the fatty was completely unconscious, and the corner of his mouth was constantly flowing blood, while his two eyes were completely shut as his naked body lay on the ground. His buttocks were covered with a yellow-colored substance…

His originally perfectly-round buttocks were now imprinted with palm marks. His buttocks were swollen and seemed to be bleeding as well. As for his bones, perhaps they were broken, but it was hard to tell…..

The hearts of everyone present were beating at the speed of lightening, while their faces were constantly twitching since neither of them knew what had happened to this fatty; what did he do to make the Old Eunuch Zhu so furious?

The Eunuch was still inside his chambers, his face was covered in despair while his entire body was trembling; his calm, composed and proud look had been completely obliterated…..

Old Zhu’s eyes were covered in a yellow colored paste, his hair, eyebrows, white robes…. Were all bathed in a golden colored tinge now…. as for his mouth…. He was vomiting ceaselessly…..

Jun Mo Xie’s plan had gone rogue due to a mixture of different circumstances… and coincidentally, the victim of this accident turned out to be Old Zhu….. and Tang Yuan had ended up bathing the Old Eunuch in a waterfall…..

The correct description would be….. A yellow river had broken past the Dam which was holding it in place……

Minister Tang was furious!

Anyone would be after watching his son being beaten into a pile of broken bones and torn flesh!

Why? Because my son is bit fat? Even this old bastard should have controlled himself…. This is too much! It looks like my son is breathing his last breaths…..

It could be said that Tang Yuan’s life had been spared only because of his patriarchy! Jun Mo Xie had only intended for Tang Yuan to fart at the time when the Old Eunuch parted his buttocks, but due to unwanted tampering with his plan, the effect of the medicinal pill had been intensified, resulting in this out-pour. The Eunuch, who was obsessed with cleanliness had never expected for such a calamity to occur, and would have killed the fatty, but refrained since he knew that the Tang Family was important to the Emperor!

“Zhu Zhu Zhu! What is the meaning of this? You need to explain yourself, Old man!” Minister Tang shouted out loudly as his heart trembled from the ache of watching his son’s tragic condition, and it seemed that he was already prepared to dismember the Old Eunuch’s body!

After a long while, a cold and dark voice resonated from the inner chambers: “Tang Qian Yu, if this fatty wasn’t Tang Wan Li’s grandson, then I would have already killed him by now. If you both didn’t belong to the Tang Family, then I would have already killed you both! Now lift you foolish son and immediately disappear from here while you still can, otherwise you’ll end up changing my mind!”

“And, all those who are waiting outside can go take a hike too!” The Old Eunuch’s thundering voice was followed by sounds vomiting, and everyone could tell that the Old Eunuch was in a very bad condition himself….

I’ve heard that the Old Eunuch is very cleanliness oriented, but what could have this fatty done to make him this angry?

Everyone looked at each other as they tried to guess, and then immediately fled the scene….. staying here is too dangerous now!

Although Minister Tang was extremely furious, he didn’t stand there to argue; A wise man knows when the odds are against him…. He quickly took his son to the doctor since the wounds were extremely serious!

Minister Tang had already realized that he would only find out the truth the following day; Tang Wan Li stormed into the Imperial Palace to find Old Zhu and demand justice for his grandson’s condition…. Grandfather Tang simply couldn’t imagine that his decades old friend would ever do such a thing to his grandson; why did you do this? This is completely insane!

As an end result of believing that the Old Eunuch’s actions were ‘completely insane’, Grandfather Tang was forced to return dejected, depressed, and furious. Fatty Tang’s condition required a lot of care and assistance from everyone in the household, and everyone was constantly kneeling over and around his body to provide him the required care. Even though Grandfather Tang and Minister Tang were furious with Tang Yuan’s actions, they both knew that it was more important to improve the status of body’s injuries at the moment…… his justifications and punishment could wait until a later time…..

However, Grandfather Tang and Minister Tang were still extremely furious, anxious, and sad since they had spent a huge sum of money to open up this channel for fatty Tang, and were already preparing for throwing a party in celebration of their success at the time this mishap occurred.

Why would our son do such a thing at such a crucial time? And it’s not like he just did it…. he did straight on the Old Eunuch’s face, eyes, and even his mouth…..

Let’s not forget that the Old Eunuch is so cleanliness oriented that he can’t even stand the thought of something like this!

Grandfather Tang and Minister Tang were sitting beside Tang Yuan’s bed as they watched his shattered body…..their mouths were constantly repeating: I’ve heard in the past that ‘diarrhea can be incited by pressurizing situations’, but I always thought that it was a joke…. But now I know that even though this is a rare thing, it can still happen…..

Once Tang Yuan emerged from the shock, Grandfather Tang furious expelled him from the house, even though his bodily injuries were still quite serious! “From now on, you’re no longer the Grandson of Tang Wan Li! You’re no longer a Tang! Quickly get out of my eyesight and disappear forever!”

Things had obviously gone too far!

However, the fatty was still so loyal that he chose to keep Jun Mo Xie’s role a secret! He screamed twice, and requested that he be escorted to the Jun residence.

The Tang Family agreed to his request for three reasons: First, Tang Yuan and Jun Mo Xie were close friends, and Jun Mo Xie would certainly give him asylum in this hour of need. Secondly, Tang Yuan’s body still hadn’t fully recovered, in fact, the injuries were still quite serious, and Jun Mo Xie being his friend would certainly look after him….. Thirdly, the two families were located quite close-by, so even though they had disowned Tang Yuan, they could still visit him easily if they were unable to control the desire to see their son…..

When Tang Yuan’s departure time came upon, he demanded two things: first, I want to take the big cupboard in my room with me; second, hand over the laundry guy to me, I want to club him to death.

His first demand was fairly easy to understand, the big closet in his room contained all the savings that he had accumulated over his lifetime. He would naturally wish to take it with him since it would help him in settling down or whatever else he needed it for. As for the laundry man of the Tang Family, Tang Yuan was being ruthless in this case; that servant was a very smart and intelligent scholar, who even though was working in a very lowly position at the moment, was slowly working his way up the ladder! Even though he was working as the laundry man inside the Tang Family, he had his eyes on the prize, and Tang Yuan had always hated him to his bones!

Since Tang Yuan was being kicked out of the family, this man would now be allowed to carry out his plans with complete freedom, and fatty Tang was sure that this two-faced man would try to occupy the position of the Family’s head.

Tang Yuan naturally didn’t want such a time bomb to exist inside his family’s courtyard in his absence, and since the fatty didn’t know when he would return, he wanted to rid himself of this worry…..

As Grandfather Jun left the Jun residence for the Imperial Palace, he saw an arrogant smile on his grandson’s face… the first of its kind.

Tang Wan Li’s grandson actually excreted on Zhu Zhu Zhu’s face……once Jun Zhan Tian had verified the world’s most hilarious news, he staggered back home, laughing the entire way, and told everyone about it. Jun Mo Xie’s facial expression suddenly transformed into that of a rooster on the way to the butcher’s…..

Oh god, what did you do you fat idiot! You actually released your… on his face? The Hitman Jun had collected all the information about the Old Eunuch before formulating his plan; he had also found out that the Old Eunuch was at least a Sky Xuan expert, and that the man’s real strength was strong enough to be comparable to his own grandfather, Jun Zhan Tian!

Seeing that his grandson didn’t even smile upon hearing such a funny tale, Jun Zhan Tian obviously asked the reason.

Jun Mo Xie replied in a voice which seemed to resemble something between weeping and laughing: “It looks like I might have had something to do with this……” Jun Zhan Tian and Jun Wu Yi almost choked as they heard his words, and started at him with a stunned look on their faces.

No one would ever be able to find out Jun Mo Xie’s involvement in this affair, unless Tang Yuan ratted him out… but if the Old Eunuch every found out that this accident was man-made, then…….

Jun Zhan Tian and Jun Wu Yi shouted out while their entire body started to sweat……

“I only intended for him to fart when the Old Eunuch checked his buttocks…….that’s all, really. And I just gave him a pill to make him fart……” Jun Mo Xie innocently looked at him grandfather and uncle: “Tang Yuan didn’t wish to become an officer, so…… I was just trying to help him out; I never intended to hurt anyone….”

They stared at him dumbstruck. They had never imaged that such a hilarious incident would be artificially fabricated; by none other than their own Jun Mo Xie! They obviously understood that this matter could never be made public; otherwise the consequences would be too severe!