Life, Once Again!

“Are you doing research for your novel?”

“No.”

“Then a travel essay like the one you wrote last time?”

“It’s not that either.”

“Then what is it?”

“Do you think mom will tell you?”

“No, definitely not.”

“Then why did you even bother asking?”

Gaeul looked at her mother, who was making a suspicious smile. She wondered what her mother was up to that required her to go out not only on weekdays but on weekends as well. When she looked at her mother, who was displaying a ‘you shouldn’t mind it since it’s your mother’s work’, as well as a ‘you want to know, don’t you?’ face, she wanted to dig into that secret. If it wasn’t for her novel, what could it be? It didn’t seem like she was doing something other than writing for work.

“Do you really want to know?”

“Can’t you give me a hint? Your daughter might die of frustration at this rate, you know?”

“Okay then. I’ll give you just a small one.”

After crossing her arms and thinking about it for a while, her mother spoke,

“Nah, I won’t after all. If I say it now, it might ruin the luck for it, so I’ll tell you later.”

“You’re so bad. What is it? Did you win the lottery or something? Is that why you’re going around since you are looking for a new house to move to?”

“If it was like that I would have told you a long time ago. Do you think mom’s playing around?”

“No, I knew you were going around doing work.”

“Just wait a little more. Once the plan is solidified and it progresses a little, no, when I press the stamp, I’ll tell you about it. Mom wants to tell you about it too. Of course I’d want to boast to my daughter.”

“Anyway, it’s a good thing, right?”

“Of course. Perhaps you might like it more than me. You’re still practicing acting right?”

“Why does acting practice come up all of a sudden?”

“It just reminded me. Anyway, do your best. And do your best at studying too. You have to hone your skills so that you can take the opportunity when it comes to you. Who knows? That opportunity might suddenly spring up from your side. Well then, get washed and get to sleep. Don’t sleep on your desk like you did before. Resting is also a form of practice.”

“Okay.”

Gaeul put down her spoon and went to the bathroom. She turned the tap to warm water before turning it on. After cold water escaped the showerhead, steaming water sprayed out. She took off her clothes and put them on the shelf before taking a step into the water that was falling down like a waterfall. What was that rabbit? Warm water flowed down her head. She thought about it while she was eating ice cream, but the conclusion she came to was that she didn’t know. It might be a frightening thing to think that there was something inside her that did not share her memories, but after conversing with the rabbit, she was relieved because she felt like it wouldn’t influence her negatively. She was a little concerned about the rabbit’s last words, but the answers were generally positive, so it shouldn’t be a problem.

After taking a shower, she wrapped her hair with a towel. She went to her room so that water didn’t fall off everywhere and sat down on her chair. She took a deep breath before thinking about the stage that the rabbit was waiting on. A feeling of time slowing down overwhelmed her before a ray of light broke through the darkness under her eyelids. She was now on the stage where the lights were installed on either side.

Hello? - she tried calling out. Her actual neck muscles tensed. She could feel her tongue inside her mouth, as well as her vocal cords, moving downwards. Although she was speaking in her mind, her body also reacted accordingly. This didn’t happen during the day. Gaeul thought that this was a difference due to concentration, or immersion. Considering the fact that 8 hours had passed by in a flash, the current situation felt better because she could feel the state of her real body. She didn’t want to experience having half a day passing after blinking again. Her shoulders were still screaming at her that they were exhausted.

After calling out several times, the rabbit appeared from behind the curtain. Gaeul was sure that the rabbit was a female. She was sure that the two ladies she saw in the distance when they parted last time were other forms of the rabbit.

-Why are you in the shape of a rabbit?

-Are you not okay with it?

-No, it’s not like that. I like rabbits.

-Do you really?

She thought this during the first time they met, but this rabbit seemed to be rather disappointed with the situation. There were thorns in its words.

-Do you perhaps hate me?

-No, I like you to death.

-What?

-I said I like you. There’s probably no one in this world who likes you more than me. Also, there should be no one who knows you better than me.

The rabbit twitched its nose before turning around. Its triangular mouth moved as though it was conversing with someone. Gaeul looked behind the rabbit. There was a darkness, which looked like it was sucking in everything, including light. The moment she saw it, she felt wary and turned her head around. What was that place?

-Don’t take interest in that. You will find out later anyway.

-Ah, okay.

-Alright. So what brings you to me again? You aren’t going to act now, are you?

-I just wanted to have a talk. I wanted to know who you were too. You didn’t answer me the last time I asked, did you?

-I don’t have a reason to answer your every question, do I?

-That’s true, I guess….

-Then forget about it. The reason I’m allowing you to meet me is because you came all the way here. It would’ve been better if you never noticed this place in your lifetime.

-Why is that? Is there a reason I should not know about you, miss rabbit?

-No, there is no reason for that. You’ll find out eventually after all. I’m just vexed at you because you’re so foolish.

-But I thought you liked me.

-I do! More than anyone. That’s why you vex me even more.

The rabbit stopped talking before raising its head.

-I don’t want to talk to you any longer. From now on, I’m not going to reply even if you come to this place. If it’s about acting, then don’t worry about it. You will definitely change. You will improve to the point that the people around you will be surprised. So don’t think about anything and keep walking forward. If you are stuck on something then just think about this stage. If you do, you will naturally see what you have to do to proceed.

The rabbit with its fire-like eyes turned around and left. Two red glass balls floated in the darkness. Gaeul looked at those eyes until she opened her actual eyes due to the cold sensation from her shoulders. A drop of water fell from her hair, which she couldn’t wrap with the towel completely. When she checked the time, she saw that about 20 minutes had passed. She threw the wet towel into the laundry basket before drying her hair with a hair dryer. When she looked at the fluttering hair in front of her eyes, she was reminded of the fluttery fur of the rabbit. Just why was that person angry? Rather than questioning the very existence of that strange being inside her, her curiosity was directed towards the emotions it harbored. It was a curious thing. It should be natural for her to be wary and watch out, but her body was completely vulnerable without any defenses towards that rabbit. It was as though she had met someone she knew well.

Why did it have to be a rabbit of all things? To her, rabbits were an important symbol. It was an animal that had a special meaning. Gaeul returned to her room and touched the ring that Maru gifted her. It was a ring with a cute rabbit engraved on it. When she stroked the rabbit’s ears with a smile, she suddenly had this thought - what made her like rabbits in the first place?

“Must be because of Alice, right?”

A rather vague answer reverberated in her mouth. She thought that she would give a clear answer just like how she would when showing off an act that she had practiced for months, but what came up was a twisted fragment of memories. There should definitely be a reason that made her like rabbits, so she decided to think about it at this opportunity.

“My girl, can you bring me a towel?”

The strand of memory that was about to come to mind shattered into smithereens. Gaeul sighed softly before standing up. That was enough thinking. She was curious, but it wasn’t important.

“I’ll put it in front of the door.”

Gaeul put a towel in front of the bathroom.

* * *

“I want to ask one last question I really wanted to know.”

“You know? You’ve always asked a difficult question when you said those words, journalist. Can I take a sip of tea before you ask?”

“Sure. You can take two if it means that I will get a good answer.”

Junmin raised the teacup. He quite liked this young journalist that was interviewing him. He was much easier to talk to than the self-proclaimed ‘veterans’ who monitored his mood at every moment. Thinking that youngsters were full of energy these days, Junmin put down the teacup and looked at the journalist. This was his signal for the journalist to ask.

“This is a really personal question, so I will ask if I can put this on the final interview separately. If you have to come up with one reason that you were able to become successful like this, what reason would you pick?”

“Just one?”

“Yes. Of course, as of right now, JA Production is said to be lacking when it comes to the scale or the careers of the actors in it compared to the other management agencies, but there are a lot of expectations placed on it just from the fact that you, president Lee Junmin, is the one leading it. Also, I have the feeling that this agency will operate with only a small group of elites. I think my prediction is not wrong based on the fact that you, who has produced multiple stars, are not cooperating with them, and instead choosing to start the JA business with a completely new group of people. Am I wrong?”

“You’re entirely right. I don’t plan to host a lot of actors in this agency. Below ten. That’s the range I plan to maintain while operating this company.”

“So I was right after all. Does that mean that you think that the current actors under your wing will grow to be bigger than the actors who have been through you?”

“You can see it that way.”

“That’s what I’m curious about. How can you strategically pick your actors like that? Oh wait, was I a little strange with the choice of words?”

“Not at all. Strategic choice, in one sense, that’s the right expression for it. A management agency is ultimately a business whose merchandise is people. You have to find the source stones, refine them and then package them before you put them out in front of people. This is primarily the case.”

“What do you mean by primarily?”

“If it’s just that, an actor’s lifespan will be too short. Actors who were nurtured to suit the tastes of the public will not be able to continue sailing and will sink if they get swept by the trends. In the end, as fundamental as this might sound, acting is everything for an actor. Everything from beginning to end is about acting. It’s a hard job that requires you to keep climbing onto a stage where you will be evaluated critically.”

“Do you mean to say that JA Production is not nurturing actors to fit the public, but rather actors that the public will have to adapt to?”

“Ultimately, that is the goal. As arrogant as I might sound, that is my dream. I will not accept any other actor than this actor - that is what I plan for the audience to say.”

“I think that’s very cool. At the same time, it begs the question: potential is a matter of probability in the end, is it not? If that’s the case, I think interacting with more actors and finding value among them will be better.”

“That is definitely correct. It is right, but it does not apply to me.”

“I see that you have confidence that the actors currently with you will stand at the top of the country?”

“It’s not confidence.”

Junmin faintly smiled.

“It’s closer to blind faith.”

The young journalist looked rather flustered.

“I’m really curious. How did you find and pick such actors? Is it a business secret?”

“I know that you will definitely get angry at me if I say something like this, so I must apologize in advance, but you will know when you see them. I was able to tell by looking.”

“We’ll know when we see them. Masters used that expression quite a lot, yes. Also, when you say you ‘were’ able to tell, does that mean that you no longer can?”

“Honestly speaking, yes, that is the case. Perhaps it’s because I’m getting old, but my eyes that discern people aren’t functioning properly anymore. That’s why I plan to pour everything into the ones I’m currently raising. Sorry for that bland answer.”

“Not at all. In fact, I am grateful that you’ve committed to the interview. Actually, I was quite nervous before we began. You are a famous person after all.”

The young journalist turned off the recording device and his laptop.

“Thank you for the interview. We’ll send you a copy of the interview before it’s released, so if there are any expressions you don’t like, please don’t hesitate to tell us. We’ll fix it right away.”

“Alright then. I very much enjoyed today. Let’s have a meal together next time.”

“I would be honored.”

Junmin stood up from his seat and shook hands with the young journalist.