I’m Really a Superstar

Two days later.

Saturday.

China was filled with anticipation.

“The premiere episode is about to begin.”

“There’s only one more hour before it begins.”

“I really want to see it. Hurry up and start already!”

“I’ve been waiting all morning!”

“Zhang Ye, go for it!”

“I hope to be surprised!”

“Face-smacking Zhang has returned to doing entertainment programs after so many years. I wonder if it will still be as brilliant as before?”

“We’ll find out soon, won’t we?”

…

Back at home.

Old Wu was taking the day off today. His parents were also here.

Wu Zeqing smiled and said, “Aren’t you going down to Central TV?”

Zhang Ye was leaning back on the sofa and amusing his daughter. “I’m not going. Let’s watch together at home as a family.”

His mother had already switched the channel in anticipation. “Why isn’t there anything on TV?”

His father said, “Aiya, it isn’t time.”

His mother asked Wu Zeqing, “Zeqing, have you told your parents to watch?”

Wu Zeqing smiled. “I’ve told them about it already. They know what time it will be showing, so I suppose they’re also watching it at home right now.”

His mother smacked her lips and said, “Why do I feel a little nervous?”

“Mom, I’m not even nervous, so what are you nervous about.” Zhang Ye was amused. “Just relax and watch it normally. Since I dared to bring this show out, it will definitely be a good one. Don’t you worry.”

His father was in high spirits. “It’s starting!”

His mother hurriedly sat down. “Stop talking!”

Countless pairs of eyes.

Countless discussions.

The media, public, industry insiders, and even viewers from countries all over the world were attracted by the advertising and news. Their curiosity for the show had peaked. Some people were already waiting in front of the television early in the morning, while it was nighttime for others. Some people in China also turned on their televisions and switched it to Central TV International, a channel they had never paid attention to before today.

Under everyone’s attention, Man vs. Wild finally premiered!

This was the first time that China had brought out a show they wanted to show to the whole world!

…

On the screen.

Zhang Ye appeared.[note: https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x3b76tn]

“I’m Zhang Ye. Some people say that I’m a host, and others say I’m a writer, film actor, movie director, singer, mathematician, and hacker. I won’t deny any of those, but I know that there is still a title I have that nobody knows about. I am a wilderness survival specialist. Now, my challenge is to go alone into one of America’s deadliest places: the Rocky Mountains. Millions of people visit them every year; 2,000 don’t return alive. I’m going into one of the most remote areas in the Rockies with only the clothes I’m wearing to show you how to be an ultimate survivor.”

On the plane.

The wind was whistling.

“I’m flying 3,000 meters above the Rockies, somewhere near the Canadian border. Since most people who end up in trouble here are caught by surprise, my team has arranged one for me. At any moment, the pilot will tell me to jump. Where? I don’t know. I don’t have a map, spare clothing, water, or food. Not even a cell phone. My mission is simple: Use all my skills to get out alive in under three days.”

The cabin’s hatch was opened.

Zhang Ye parachuted down.

“Oh, it’s a jungle!”

“This is a very dangerous position to be!”

“God save me!”

“Damn, I’m stuck in a tree.”

“Phew, I’m lucky to still be alive. I have to find a way to leave this place. I’m at least 10 meters up. If I jump, I’ll break my legs. There’s only one way out of this, and it’s something I’ve never done before. Remember, if you get into danger in the wild, the first thing to do is to keep calm, because that will likely save your life.”

“Ah!”

“I’m down.”

“I need to look for a river now, as that means food and water.”

“Look at what I found. This is a type of local vegetation. I know that it might not taste good, but I don’t really have a choice. I have to eat it to recover some of my strength.”

“Oh, a snake!”

“This is a rattlesnake and it’s extremely venomous.”

“You’ll need a branch that looks like this. See, I’ve caught it.”

“This is great. That’s gonna make for a good bit of dinner.”

“It’s the dead of night right now. I don’t know exactly what time it is but I can hear some sounds out there, and it’s giving me a bad feeling. There, it’s happening again! Did you hear that? It sounds like a wild beast, but I’m not sure what it is. This is a terrible feeling, and I can’t help but think of the bear prints during the day. Although I tried to stay as far away from the area as possible when I set up shelter, I know that bears have a very keen sense of smell. If it has really set its eyes on me, it’s definitely not good news for me.”

“Heavens! It’s a bear!”

“Goddammit! I have to get out of here!”

“Run!”

“It’s a cliff, I have nowhere else I can go!”

“I’m gonna jump, wish me luck!”

…

At the studio.

Many of the staff were speechless. They were watching it for the first time.

“What kind of grass is that!”

“No idea.”

“Did Director Zhang really eat it?”

“Yeah, he really ate it.”

…

At Yao Jiancai’s house.

“Dad, Uncle Zhang could even eat tree bark?”

“This fellow must have gone crazy from hunger!”

“Ah, he even ate the venomous snake?”

“This glutton!”

…

At Central TV.

“It’s a bear!”

“Heavens!”

“It’s a real bear! It’s been recorded!”

“It’s over! This is too dangerous!”

…

Back at home.

“Son, have you gone crazy!”

“You even leaped off the cliff?”

“Didn’t you say that there wouldn’t be any danger?! There was even a bear!”

“Ahem, it’s really not dangerous. We found actors to play it. It was just actors.”

“Actors, your grandpa! Like you have any actors with so much body hair!”

…

China.

“Ahhh!”

“Face-smacking Zhang is gonna get sacrificed!”

“It’s really a bear!”

“How thrilling! This is so fun to watch!”

“He really risked his life to film this show!”

…

America.

“Holy fuck!”

“Zhang Ye has been attacked!”

“Will he escape?”

“He jumped off the cliff! God! That was terrifying!”

“His physical fitness is really good!”

…

The UK.

“Whew, he finally shook it off!”

“It was so close!”

“Oh no, there’s another bear! It doesn’t look like the one from before!”

“The Chinese man is out of luck! He’s in danger!”

…

Japan.

“It’s a real situation!”

“Are there shows that are shot like that?”

“Has he gone mad?”

“Of course he’s mad! Is this the first day you learned about him?”

…

Korea.

“Quick, watch Man vs. Wild!”

“I’m definitely not watching Zhang Ye’s show!”

“Zhang Ye is going to get eaten by a bear!”

“What? Which channel is it on? I’ll go watch it right away!”

“Pfft, can you guys be a bit more humane?”

…

India.

“Devour him! Devour him!”

“Quickly eat him! This stupid bear! Chase after him, quick!”

“Zhang Ye is escaping by swimming away! Quickly chase after him!”

“What a dumb bear, why is it running so slowly!”

…

Pakistan.

“He’s managed to escape!”

“There’s a road there!”

“Thank goodness!”

“Impressive, my Chinese bro!”

“He’s indeed the man who ran the best half-marathon this year!”

…

Another 40 minutes passed.

The first episode ended.

Immediately, heated discussions blew up all across the world!