Chapter 696: Dangers of Wireless Internet
Chapter 696: Dangers of Wireless Internet
“I’m not acting for anyone.” I snapped, “It’s normal to have these kinds of interactions between childhood friends… probably.”
Seeing that I was a little embarrassed, Xiao Qin did not keep digging any deeper.
“Can I sit on this chair?” Xiao Qin pointed to the chair I had just sat on and asked with excessive caution.
“Go ahead.” I waved my hand, “You don’t have to ask my permission for everything as long as it’s within the boundaries of what normal childhood friends would do.”
Xiao Qin took off her bag and hung it on the back of her chair, then turned her face toward me and asked:
“Is asking me to continue to act as your girlfriend in front of Ai Mi and Winnie normal for childhood friends?”
“What else would you do?” I asked rhetorically, “If Ai Mi knew you weren’t my girlfriend, don’t you know how she would ridicule you?”
“That, that’s true…” Xiao Qin’s arms trembled slightly. Xiao Qin really may not be able to bear it if Ai Mi rubbed salt into her wound.
Seeing a sad expression on Xiao Qin’s face, I consoled her, “Don’t be discouraged, I said I’d give you a second chance. When we pretend to be a couple in front of Ai Mi and Winnie, you can think of it as a rehearsal.”
Xiao Qin suddenly looked like the fairy godmother had cast a spell on her and her body emitted radiance and vitality.
“I, I will definitely try my best. I will definitely try to become a girl you would like. I would fight so you would take the initiative next time, to ask me to be your girlfriend…”
Halfway through the sentence, due to her lack of confidence, her voice gradually became quieter, and she lowered her head to not look me directly in the eyes, because she was afraid that I was angry.
“Be more confident in yourself.” I said, “It’s more like you when you show this kind of zeal. You’ve been talking less these days and I’m not used to it.”
“Then…” Xiao Qin saw me being surprisingly friendly, so she was not as reserved as before, “If we’re in front of Ai Mi and Winnie, when we pretend to be a couple, can I act coquettish? “
“Sure.” I don’t think that I should give Xiao Qin too many limitations, otherwise Ai Mi would be able to see through our lies if it’s too fake.
“Can I wrap my arms around yours?”
“Sure.”
“Can I hug you when I’m happy?”
“Sure.”
“Can I ask you to help me carry my shopping bags when we’re at the mall?”
“Sure, no problem.”
“If there’s only one seat left on the bus, can I also sit on your lap?”
“Um… I don’t think Ai Mi would ride the bus with us, but with Winnie is a possibility…”
“Sorry, is asking to sit on your lap going overboard?”
“No, if we are in front of Ai Mi or Winnie, and the bus is too crowded without a place to stand, then it’s fine for you to sit on my lap.”
“Um…” listening to me say “sure” to all her requests, Xiao Qin became more and more excited. “If it’s in front of Ai Mi and Winnie, it seems like I’m even more like your girlfriend than before.”
I frowned and thought about it, “You can think that way.”
“Hooray ~(≧▽≦)/~.” Xiao Qin couldn’t resist the urge to stand up from her chair to celebrate, but she stopped herself halfway, as if she thought it would make her look like a moron.
“(^__^) hehehe…” But overall it was difficult for her to change her nature. She looked at me with a smile and the joy in her eyes couldn’t be concealed.
“Stop giggling, you brought your summer homework, right?” I said, “What don’t you understand, I’ll teach you.”
Since I couldn’t do any physical activities, it would be good to work my brain.
In order to stimulate our enthusiasm for learning, the math teacher once said in class, “Learn mathematics and chemistry well, so you won’t be afraid no matter where you go.” Although the correctness of his statement is debatable, it is an indisputable fact that Xiao Qin’s math and physics was disastrous.
When solving for the surface area of a rectangular box without a lid, Xiao Qin often forgets the area of the bottom surface. Her reasoning was that the diagram did not clearly draw it and that the bottom surface was blocked by the other four sides.
Also in the blank answer area, she drew a crooked box. Is that even a box? That looks more like the crushed remains of Spongebob.
As for the question “Why doesn’t the Leaning Tower of Pisa fall down”, she doesn’t reply with “center of gravity”, “heavy vertical line”, “fulcrum”, or “support surface”, but she egotistically answered:
“Because it’s a world-famous attraction, so the Italian government sent 1,000 people underground to pull it up with a rope. If it fell down, they wouldn’t be able to collect entrance fees anymore.”
She was afraid the teacher wouldn’t understand, so she also drew a side profile of many people underground pulling up the Leaning Tower of Pisa.
In the chemistry homework, it mentioned diamond and graphite are the same element, but it made Xiao Qin even more confused?
“If it’s really the same thing, why doesn’t the Diamond Sutra change its name to the Graphite Sutra?”
Hurry up and apologize to Buddhists around the world! I think your logic jumps all over the place. Why does teaching you math and science feel no less difficult than taking Ai Mi to win LOL ranked matches?
I decided to first instruct Xiao Qin to finish all the science homework, then I could just copy all of it for my own homework, then I would be finished the summer’s work too.
Even with the curtains closed, there was plenty of light. I had a rare feeling of peace and comfort as I guided Xiao Qin through her homework.
How peaceful. I hope my heart problems can be cured and I can enjoy this life some more.
Time flew by in the blink of an eye and it was already noon. Xiao Qin said she wanted to go dine with her mother in the ward, so it wouldn’t be good for me to make her stay.
“Right, we’re going to have lunch anyway, so why don’t we ask the French chef to make something suitable for the patients and then you can bring it to Auntie Ren?” I suggested.
The French chef loved being a chef from the bottom of his heart. As long as someone liked to eat what he made, he always went out of his way to fire up the stove right away.
Xiao Qin hesitated, “Mom wants to eat bamboo shoots these days, does the chef know how to make bamboo shoots?”
“Yes, the five-color salad in contains bamboo shoots.” I was proud of the French chef as if he was my family, “If you talk to him, he will make you a delicious dish that includes bamboo shoots.”
“I’ll go talk to him.” Xiao Qin was puzzled for a moment, then said, “By the way, the chef doesn’t know Chinese, but he knows some English, so he can communicate with me in English, but for Ye Lin classmate…”
I blushed, “I only gesture, or draw the things I want to eat on a piece of paper…”
Hearing me say that, Xiao Qin’s eyes lit up, “Since you can only express yourself with pictures, then I, the future mangaka, can draw what I want to eat as well!”
“Please wait a moment, I’ll draw it, then you take it to the chef, he will definitely know what I want.”
I couldn’t stop her in time. She had already torn a piece of sketch paper and finished the picture of “steamed bamboo shoots” she had in mind with a ball point pen.
The lines she drew this time looked inexplicably rigid, so rigid that they looked more like a building.
This is the steamed Leaning Tower of Pisa, damn it.
I ended up redrawing a crooked steamed bamboo shoot on the back of the paper, which was barely understandable to the chef.
Xiao Qin didn’t leave room 103 and waited until I came back with the packed steamed bamboo shoots and pork porridge. She happily saluted me while still obliviously thinking that it was her superior drawing skills that made the chef understand it so quickly.
“Oh O(∩_∩)O~ now mom and I will both have something to eat, thank you, and also help me say thank you to the chef.”
With my help, she flipped out the window and left, she was in a good mood before leaving and even muttered to herself:
“It looks like my drawing skills have improved again. I’m almost frightened by my artistic talent, should I finish the shoujo manga I used to draw and submit it to an editor…”
Which manga, “Love at Zhou Kou Dian”? Or some other unbearable, disastrous work?
Please spare the editor, don’t injure both his eyes with your art.
After Xiao Qin left, I received a temperature check from Dr. Yu. As I was looking forward to the French chef’s lunchtime meal, I received a call from Shu Zhe.
“Brother Ye Lin, you… you have to save me.”
Shu Zhe pleaded with me with a crying voice immediately after I picked up.
“What kind of trouble are you in again?” I asked him in a bad mood.
“I… didn’t cause any trouble this time, it’s a punishment from the heavens.” Shu Zhe said, “I was coerced by ‘Uncle Fireball’.”
Huh, isn’t ‘Uncle Fireball’ one of the perverted customers like ‘Cilantro Buns’ who told me to sell worn underwear, as well as blowing balloons, and blowing condoms?
“What, you met Uncle Fireball in real life?” I asked, “Aren’t you usually dressed as a man? Were his eyes so accurate, he can even recognize it was you even when you wore a wig and colored contacts?”
Shu Zhe choked with regret for a moment before finally making up his mind and admitted:
“I, I’m now at my aunt’s house, being forced by my uncle to walk around in a cat maid costume every day, serving him tea, massaging his shoulders and back…”
“Wait a minute.” I said in bewilderment, “Just now, you said you were coerced by Uncle Fireball, so how did it turn into your uncle?”
“I…” I don’t know how much abuse Shu Zhe suffered in the past few days, but he could not help but let out a cry, “How would I have expected that my uncle is Uncle Fireball? He’s the one who taught my sister how to use a gun, my own uncle!”
“It’s only been a few years since we last saw each other, but ever since he learned how to use wireless internet in the forest keepers lodge, he gradually went from a veteran hunter to a huge pervert!”
“He recognized that I was the person who sold the worn underwear to him. He was angry at first, but then he looked very happy. Now, he forces me to continue to live in his house. Every day behind closed doors, he makes me dress up as a cat maid to serve him, the gaze he uses to look at me is becoming more and more odd…”
“Bro Ye Lin, if you don’t come to my rescue, I’m afraid my own uncle will…”