I’m Not Going to Be Bullied By a Girl

The television volume was lowered slightly outside, I was still sitting in the study chair, not being able to move or make a sound. This damn chair is also so uncomfortable.

Xiao Qin and her mom’s conversation passed through the bedroom door, I couldn’t help but overhear what they were saying.

Auntie Ren’s voice hasn’t changed much since I last heard it when I was a child, it exhibited the independence of a mature woman.

Xiao Qin acted like an obedient daughter in front of her mom and answered everything she asked.

“Xiao Qin, how was your week at school? Are you used to it yet?”

“Un, the new school isn’t bad! I like it a lot!”

I don’t know what Xiao Qin likes about 28 Middle.

“It’s good as long as you like it, even though I know that school isn’t that good… say, even if you wanted to go there for school, wouldn’t it have been more convenient to go to your uncle’s school?”

“Buuut, I don’t like private schools~~~~~~~”

Although I was separated by a door and couldn’t see, I could imagine Xiao Qin’s sappy appearance in front of her mom.

“Mom, don’t ask about school anymore, tell me about anything interesting that happened on set!”

Xiao Qin changed the topic proficiently.

I remember reading it from a newspaper before, after retiring from the MMA world, Auntie Ren became a martial arts coach in the film industry. Auntie Ren has participated in several Kung-fu films in the past couple of years, one of them even got an award in a foreign film festival.

Which film invited her this time?

Auntie Ren sighed deeply, it seems that work wasn’t going that well.

“Don’t even mention it, I told you last time, this film was a Hollywood investment. They said they wanted to ‘Mix in Eastern elements and seize China’s market’, but it’s clearly a magic fantasy film, yet they insist on calling it a Kung-fu film. If it wasn’t for the fact that I had good friends in the crew, I wouldn’t even consider this job!”

Saying that she hammered the sofa’s armrest.

As if she was afraid of scaring Xiao Qin, after stopping, Auntie Ren eased her tone.

“Hmph, let me tell you something, none of the American actors know anything about Kungfu, they’re all either singers, dancers or crosstalkers.” (TN: crosstalk is also known as xiangshen, pretty much a duo comedy act)

“Eh? Does crosstalk exist in America?”

“They’re talk show hosts! I’ve always treated them as crosstalkers.”

“That’s not bad! Their performances must be interesting, right!”

Xiao Qin played the role of the listener and from time to time comforted her mom.

The roles for their conversation is kinda reversed, typically shouldn’t the mom be listening to the daughter’s problems?

“Interesting? Maybe only Americans might find it interesting? I can’t understand that American style of comedy at all. Hou BaoLin and Chen PeiSi are much better than them!”

“Then…is the entire cast and crew American? Mom, you better not get bullied by those American devils.”

Auntie Ren scoffed.

“There’s not that many Americans, more than half were hired locally, American salaries are too high! Then again, even if all those singers, dancers, and crosstalkers ganged up on me, they wouldn’t be a match for me! Though there was one black and buff private bodyguard that looked difficult to deal with…”

Hearing this I started thinking: A Kung fu film starring an American, there’s even a big bodyguard that Auntie Ren can’t disregard.

Is it the crew Ai Mi’s a part of? Director Cao also mentioned this film, I think it was called “Legend of the Magic Cauldron” or something? Isn’t this too much of a coincidence! Wouldn’t this mean Auntie Ren would have to coach Ai Mi on site?

With Ai Mi’s terrible personality, would she even be able to cooperate with Auntie Ren?

I’m a little worried.

“Hehe, it seems like there’s a lot of Chinese people with Mom, then I guess I’m relieved?”

“Stop talking nonsense, even if we were born in the same country, it doesn’t mean we’re on the same side. Also, although more than half of the staff members are Chinese, we have to communicate in English on site, it really is annoying trying to translate some martial art terms into English!”

Xiao Qin started giggling.

“Mom should be fine, right? Isn’t your English very fluent? When you met dad in Hong Kong, you also didn’t understand his Cantonese and ended up communicating in English, right?”

Auntie Ren’s tone suddenly became strict:

“Don’t call him dad! That person is unrelated to us! Your surname is Ren, not his Huo!!”

“Sorry…Mom, I won’t bring it up anymore…”

Xiao Qin replied quietly like a mosquito.

This is the first time I’ve seen Auntie Ren get angry with Xiao Qin, when I was a child and saw that Little Tyrant’s mom was all docile and obedient, I was once very envious.

The mother and daughter had nothing else to say. In the end, Auntie Ren coughed twice and broke the silence that she caused.

“Okay, mom shouldn’t have snapped at you, don’t blame mom, okay?”

“(*^__^*)Hee hee, I won’t hold it against you, mom has always pampered me since I was young～?”

“That’s good. Let me tell you, today on set, something else bad happened…”

It seemed like Xiao Qin took a sip of tea and was waiting for her mom to continue speaking.

“Your mother, I, thought that none of the American actors knew Chinese, so I was complaining to the cameraman and said: “These people are so unprofessional, especially that blond girl, she’s in such bad shape yet she came to film a Kungfu film”…what do you think happened?”

“What happened?”

“That girl, the one who only knows how to sing, called Ai Mi’er, she actually came up to me and called me stupid!” (TN: literally insults her as three eight, based on March 8, International woman’s day, just means someone who gossips, is annoying and talks behind people’s back)

I can imagine that, with Ai Mi’s personality, after hearing Auntie Ren saying bad things to her face, she wouldn’t be able to endure it. It’s already good enough that she didn’t order Peng TouSi to go PK Auntie Ren.

It seems like Xiao Qin choked on some tea and coughed a few times.

“H-how strange! Why does an American have such good Chinese? Mom, you didn’t stoop to her level, right?”

“Of course, but her superior attitude really pissed me off, if she wasn’t so young, I would have kicked her flying!”

“Mom, drink some tea and moisten your throat.”

Auntie Ren took a sip of tea and continued speaking:

“What a mockery, they hired so many people who don’t know Kung fu to make a Kung-fu film, they just depend on wires and CG, it really is different from before…”

It seems like Xiao Qin stood up from the sofa and went to the kitchen and added some water to the teapot.

“Hey, Xiao Qin do you want to play a role? Your skill is definitely better than theirs, right? For a role of lesser importance, I still have some authority to arrange.”

“I’m not going, showing your face in public isn’t suitable for girls.”

Xiao Qin rejected her mom’s proposal without any hesitation.

“B-but, if you need a boy role, then there’s someone around the same age as me…can I recommend someone to go and try?”

Does…Xiao Qin want to recommend me? Why do you keep remembering my immature dream! Stop bringing it up! I blush just thinking about it!

Auntie Ren snorted.

“Don’t tell me it’s that brat from teacher Ye’s house?”

Xiao Qin’s silence confirmed it.

Auntie Ren had a habit of calling my father teacher Ye. It’s technically not wrong. When I was young, dad used to give cram lessons to the kids in our neighborhood.

“Xiao Qin, tell me the truth: You said you had to go to 28 Middle, was it to find this brat?”

Xiao Qin remained silent.

When I heard the conversation topic switch towards me, my heart started thumping frantically.

“Don’t think I didn’t see the photo by your bed! Even if you guys had a good relationship when you were kids, you don’t have to look at it all the time, right?”

A good relationship my ass! It’s because the Little Tyrant never bullied me in front of you! So Xiao Qin told you that we were good friends behind my back? This ‘good friend’ practically tortured me to death every day!

After talking about me, Xiao Qin never said anything. I could only to hear Auntie Ren talking non-stop.

“Although that Ye brat was well-behaved when he was young, after all these years, who knows what he’s become? It better not just be your wishful thinking…”

Xiao Qin couldn’t hold it in anymore.

“Mom, stop always calling him ‘brat’, he has a name! He’s called Ye Lin, he’s now my neighbor in class and he often helps me at school!”

Help… help your sister! I stepped on your shoes, pulled out your chair, poured cola over your head, I’ve done plenty of bad things! If you keep praising me in front of Auntie Ren, I’ll be so embarrassed that I just want to crawl into a hole and die!

Auntie Ren spoke with a tone of slight disbelief.

“Hmph, if it wasn’t for the fact that you stayed home for 3 years and you finally agreed to go to school, I wouldn’t have helped you to this extent!”

“(*^__^*) *Giggle* I know that mom loves me!”

“Don’t try that act on me! I’m telling you now, don’t get taken advantage of by that Ye Lin. If he dares lay his hands on you, break one of his arms and one of his legs. Don’t worry about the consequences, I’ll take care of it for you!”

I listened and trembled with fear. From what I’ve heard from Auntie Ren, it would be a simple task for Xiao Qin to give me hemiplegia!

“Mom, what are you saying! I haven’t practiced martial arts for over three years, my strength and reaction have long since degraded to the level of an ordinary junior high student!”

Auntie Ren snorted out loud as a sign of skepticism.

I don’t believe it either. If an ordinary junior high student in China can break a pervert’s two fingers in the time it takes to make some small talk. Then the Captain of the police force can definitely charge into the White House on a horse and retrieve the president’s head.

“Mom, you don’t have to worry, I’m having a great time at the new school, and Ye Lin classmate treats me very well!”

I am ashamed of myself, just 10 minutes earlier I was forcing Xiao Qin to take off all her clothes.

Auntie Ren’s snort was even louder than before.

You’re right, if you exclude the black history of Little Tyrant, then I really do feel in debt to you mother-daughter pair.

Auntie Ren sighed.

“Xiao Qin, you’re too young, be careful of being deceived… Of course, I might not be qualified to say this, but as a mother, there are some things that I must say.”

“Don’t worry mom, Ye Lin will never lie to me!”

I don’t know where Xiao Qin’s confidence came from as she said that line. I guess the current expression on Auntie Ren’s face would be worry and helplessness.

“Forget it, the water’s done, I’m going to take a bath first. Sit here and think about it a bit more, don’t just blindly jump into a fire.”

I suddenly realized that this was an opportunity to escape.

When I was hesitating, Xiao Qin twisted the handle and opened the bedroom door.