I Might Be A Fake Cultivator

The Winter Dragon Tomb was located on a highland at the border of Heavenly River State and Stone Dragon State.

An Lin rode on Da Bai’s back, and they finally arrived at this highland after flying for one thousand five hundred kilometers.

“M-hm… Based on the coordinates given by the map, this should be the place.”

An Lin pointed toward a location that was surrounded by a few dead trees.

Looking toward their destination which was not far away, Xu Xiaolan remarked, “There’s nothing here at all. Could it be that there’s a concealment spell formation?”

An Lin nodded. “The map is telling me that there’s a spatial spell formation here. Those dead trees over there are the formation flags. We need to shift them in order to open the spatial door and enter the tomb.”

“You can even talk to the map?!” Xu Xiaolan exclaimed in astonishment.

“Of course!” An Lin replied proudly. “This thing has a spirit and it’s recognized me as its owner. We can communicate our thoughts to each other.”

Xu Xiaolan sighed in wonder. Truly, anything can develop a spirit if it lives long enough.

Following the map’s instructions, An Lin activated immortal spells and started to adjust the positions of the dead trees.

After the last dead tree was adjusted into place, vital energy started swarming about fiercely. A gigantic spell formation appeared on the ground, and seven-colored iridescent clouds formed in the sky. The scale of this was especially tremendous.

“Tsk, tsk, tsk. So impressive. It’s as if some rare treasure is descending from the heavens. What are we going to do if it attracts other people over?” An Lin couldn’t help but grumble in dissatisfaction.

“Don’t jinx it!” Xu Xiaolan glared at An Lin.

An Lin shut his mouth. This kind of thing truly was abnormal and bizarre. Especially after coming into contact with cultivation, he harbored even more respect and fear for this kind of mystical karma now.

After a while, a door made of white light appeared in the center of the spell formation. They couldn’t see clearly what lay behind this door.

“One can’t enter this door without the authority of the map. Hold my hand tight.”

Saying this, An Lin grabbed onto Xu Xiaolan’s soft and slender hand and stepped into the spatial door.

Xu Xiaolan was a bit tense, but she didn’t say anything and let An Lin hold her hand.

After they entered the door, what greeted them was a stand-alone mystic realm.

The sky was white and there wasn’t any formed land. Instead, there were numerous gigantic boulders floating in the sky.

On each boulder was a humongous palace.

“Wow! This place is so magnificent! Judging by the appearance of these palaces, this place definitely holds impressive things!” An Lin couldn’t help but gasp in admiration. One had to realize, he was a male who had wandered through the Green Wood Imperial Palace before.

Based on external appearance alone, the palaces here were no lesser than those at Green Wood Imperial Palace. There were jade buildings and golden palaces, and they all looked imposing and resplendent while exuding an air of extravagance.

Xu Xiaolan smiled. “There are so many palaces. Which one are we going to first?”

“We’ll start at the nearest palace. Then, we’ll sweep through them all one by one. We’ll take everything valuable!”

He estimated that there were around twenty-three palaces sitting on the floating boulders. Together with the other floating fragments, they formed a unique pattern. It looked a bit like a gigantic winding dragon.

The furthest palace was radiating with a white glow, and it made one feel like immediately rushing over to investigate it right upon seeing it. However, An Lin was someone who adhered to the principle of always sweeping through maps methodically. Thus, he persisted in starting his plundering from the first palace.

Just like that, they stepped onto the first floating boulder. Sitting atop this boulder was a cyan-colored palace. The plaque resting above the entrance of this palace read “Palace of Spring”.

…

…

What was the most boring occupation?

Being a bodyguard? Although bodyguards didn’t have any personal freedom, at least they were able to follow their masters around everywhere. From time to time, they could even flex for their masters.

Being a doorkeeper? Although doorkeepers were always stuck in one place, at least they had holidays and could go to enjoy themselves in the world of sensual pleasure. When they worked, they could also meet all kind of different people. As they guarded the door, they could also do many things to amuse themselves and pass time.

If Spring Male was to give an answer, then he would say that the most boring job in existence was being a tomb keeper.

That was right— the job that he had now was the most f*cking boring!

Personal freedom? Didn’t exist!

He was trapped inside this stand-alone realm and couldn’t leave even if he wanted to.

Holidays? Uh-huh… To him, this job also counted as taking a holiday, no?

He could do as he pleased in this palace. As long as he didn’t beat, smash, loot, and burn things, he could do anything that he wanted. However, it seemed like everything that he did was boring. After all, there was absolutely nothing that he could play with and enjoy here.

He wanted to sing loudly. However, even asking for an audience of a single mosquito seemed to be an extravagant demand…

How long had he been in this job for? One hundred years? One thousand years? Ten thousand years?

Spring Male already couldn’t remember clearly how long had passed.

He only knew that his biggest regret in life was choosing to become a tomb keeper.

He really must’ve been f*cking crazy back then to take that kind of Heavenly Dao Oath and pledge that he would guard this Winter Dragon Tomb and only regain his freedom when a person of destiny came to inherit the legacy here.

If the heavens gave him another chance and allowed him to stand in front of Shen Yin again, he would definitely say these two words to her:

“Fuck off!”

If he had to place a time period on these two words, then his wish was: ten thousand years!

…

Spring Male had a feeling. That was, he would have to act as a tomb keeper for all eternity…

Today, Spring Male sat on a chair in the Palace of Spring as he always did. He sat there blankly, he dozed off, and he thought deeply about life.

He was unable to leave this place. He had become bored of every single item inside this palace, including those thick and sturdy poles.

“Today is another boring day…” Spring Male murmured.

“Ah… Let’s just play rock—paper—scissors.”

He extended his left hand and right hand. “Rock… paper… scissors!”

His left hand was rock, and his right hand was paper.

“Rock… paper… scissors!”

His left hand was scissors, and his right hand was rock.

“Hehe, Little Left, you’ve lost two games in a row. You need to work harder~”

…

…

Creak…

This sudden sound interrupted Spring Male’s game.

The door opened, and Spring Male’s body trembled.

It wasn’t the wind and it wasn’t ghosts. It was people!!!

He saw two figures walk in. They appeared dazzling with the sun shining behind them.

That was the light of dawn! That was the light of redemption! That was the hope of life!

“Ah!” Spring Male squealed strangely and leaped toward the two people. “Fated persons!!!”

Mountain Quaking Lightning Fist!

Divine Phoenix Slash!

Boom!

Spring Male was struck by the golden lightning fist, then slashed by the flaming sword. He collapsed to the floor and rolled into the distance.

“Ahahaha… It’s real, this feeling of pain is real! I’m not dreaming! Hahaha…!” Spring Male was extremely moved and he laughed heartily. Tears of joy brimmed in his eyes.

The two people who had entered the Palace of Spring were none other than An Lin and Xu Xiaolan.

They exchanged a glance and saw the quizzical look in each other’s eyes.

Is the guardian of this palace… a madman?

Spring Male stood up, and his entire body was still shaking. This was his long-buried blood seething with excitement!

The image of luscious green trees intertwining suddenly appeared around him. The branches and vines of these trees appeared material as they slithered outwards into the surroundings. This was clearly an impressively powerful domain.

Soul Formation Stage?!

An Lin and Xu Xiaolan both felt a shiver as they looked intently toward Spring Male.

They didn’t expect to come across such a powerful enemy right after entering the ancient tomb. What were they meant to do now?

“Hahaha! Welcome to the Palace of Spring, fated persons. I’m Spring Male, the ruler of this palace. If you receive my acknowledgment, then you can obtain the Palace of Spring’s pill refinement inheritance.” Spring Male laughed heartily, and his demeanor made one feel as if he was trustworthy and mighty.

An Lin grimaced. Spring Male? Who gave him such a strange name?

“Then how can we receive your acknowledgment?” Xu Xiaolan maintained a high level of alert as she asked this.

“Good question!” Spring Male waved his long sleeve and continued, “Firstly, your pill refinement rank must be at least that of the Spirit Gathering Stage!”

An Lin: “…”

“What stage is the Spirit Gathering Stage?”

“Didn’t you listen in class?” Xu Xiaolan asked. “There are five pill refinement stages: Flame Mastery Stage, Wish Fulfilment Stage, Spirit Gathering Stage, Soul Creation Stage, and Supreme Stage. Right now, I’m only of the Wish Fulfilment Stage…”

“I only know how to roll out small clay balls. I probably haven’t even reached the Flame Mastery Stage yet. Let’s just fight with him.”

Xu Xiaolan shot a glance at him. “Are you stupid? Why the hell would you fight if there’s no inheritance to be obtained? Turn around and run!”

An Lin clapped his hands together. “That’s true~”

Saying this, the two of them started to turn around.

“Don’t leave!!!” Spring Male yelled. He extended his hand and the branches and vines of the trees quickly writhed out and blocked the door.

“What I said just then… Pretend that I never said it!”

Spring Male’s eyes were red as he said this.

“Hah?” An Lin was stumped. He looked toward Spring Male strangely.

“Actually, you guys can accept my inheritance as long as you know how to refine spirit pills.”

An Lin: “…”

Xu Xiaolan: “…”

“Uh, I think I can refine spirit pills below the eighth rank.” Xu Xiaolan chuckled in embarrassment.

Spring Male nodded. He pointed toward Xu Xiaolan and said solemnly, “Very well! Congratulations, fated person! You have successfully passed the trial and can now accept the Palace of Spring’s pill refinement inheritance!”

An Lin: “…”

Xu Xiaolan: “…”