Everybody is Kung Fu Fighting, While I Started a Farm

The black panther growled, seething through its spirit voice “I’m not a big kitty…”

“Am I supposed to respect you?”

With a flick of his wrist, Jiang He slapped the black panther’s cheek firmly with the back of his Dragon-Slaying Saber, sending the creature flying into a cliff wall near the creek with a dull thud. The wall shattered and the ground shook as mountain boulders rolled to the ground.

The black panther howled and puked another blood. However, just as it turned and attempted to dart into the mountain forests to escape, Jiang He caught up in no time at all, restraining it and giving it another good thrashing.

The speed the creature had always been most proud of was lacking before Jiang He’s Blind Princess’s Eight Practices.

Still, having fear beaten literally into itself, it quickly spoke through its spirit voice, “I was just reminding you that I’m not a kitty…”

It was feeling grief.

‘I am just a little upset with the name ‘big kitty’ and growled a little in discontent. Why would you keep hitting me?’

“How dare you use I¹ in my face?”

Jiang He smirked, the third of the four rules of ‘physical beast-taming techniques’ appearing in his mind then—

It was always the Ferals’ fault!

And what should be done when they do something wrong?

Give them a beating, of course!

***

Minutes later, the black panther was lying on the ground, its blank eyes staring up at the night sky in despair.

It could neither win nor flee.

What else could I do?

At the same time, Mu Wanqiu looked utterly confused, and asked, “Didn’t you already tame the black panther, Jiang He? Why would you beat it up?”

Pausing, she then added, “It looks… pitiful.”

Still, Mu Wanqiu was aware that ‘pitiful’ was not how you describe a Feral. Even so, that word unwittingly appeared in her mind as she looked at the black panther just lying there.

Jiang He smiled and explained, “This is best-taming. You have to beat them often, or they won’t listen.”

“…”

Mu Wanqiu was a little speechless.

She may not have seen how beast-tamers calmed Ferals with her own eyes, according to the studies by the Superpower Research Department… those who awakened the power of beast-taming would communicate with Ferals with a unique method, and then spiritually form a special connection to control Ferals.

Could it be that Jiang He’s beast-taming method was as unique as he said?

Whatever the case might be, they managed to capture a rank-seven Feral alive and ‘tame’ it. Two more rank-six Ferals and the objective of their trip here was achieved.

After that, Jiang He smiled even as he instructed Mu Wanqiu to clean the barbecue set. “Big kitty, now that you’ve calmed down, you can talk to me, I believe?”

The black panther quickly nodded.

“What’s actually going on at Mount Helan?” Jiang He asked. “There’s word of a treasure spreading out there, is that true? And I heard that there are many mutated plants up there?’

The black panther hence told Jiang He everything he knew without holding anything back.

“Many mutated plants?”

“Black wood-ear, violet mushrooms?”

“And one enormous willow tree that eats people?”

Jiang He frowned at that.

An enormous willow tree that eats people?

The information about floral spirits that he read about on the Warrior Home forum came to mind then, and Jiang He couldn’t help stirring in spirit. “Could that willow tree had gained intelligence?”

From what Jiang He could tell, was the ‘spirit’ that floral spirits gained not the same as intelligence?

He had not been especially attentive about the effects of floral spirits. Promoting longevity and strengthening cultivation or qi was chickenfeed to him anyway, since any fruit or vegetable he would plant in his yard would have the same effect.

“Willow tree, willow tree…”

“I vaguely remember a willow tree mentioned in a novel. It was called the Willow God that stood since ancient times and was outrageously powerful. Wonder if I could plant one in my yard.”

Jiang He decided to try.

According to the black panther, the willow tree was very powerful and might have reached the level of rank-nine. Reasonably speaking, his farm level was still too low and he would not be able to play anything rank-nine… but that’s for Ferals and humans.”

“Willow tree, willow tree… it’s still a tree no matter how powerful it is. And is there a yard where trees can’t grow?”

Jiang He hence rose to his feet and gave Mu Wanqiu a head’s up, saying, “I heard from the black panther that there is a mystical tree up in the mountain. You know that I like farming and procuring some unique crops, which is why I’m ready to try if I could move the tree over to my yard.”

“I’m going too!”

Mu Wanqiu, who was squatting beside the creek and washing the barbecue set quickly rose to her feet.

“Why would you go there?”

Jiang He was at a loss for words. “Look, you hadn’t even finished washing up. Did you use the detergents I brought along?”

“You just stay here and don’t go anywhere. I’ll be right back.’

“Moreover, you are quite strong. I’ve asked the black panther and it said that there aren’t powerful Ferals nearby, and there wouldn’t be any danger if you didn’t run off.”

Jiang He felt as if he was now a father worried over every little thing. Indeed, just after he was a few steps away, he couldn’t help turning back to say, “If you’re bored, there’s still that pack of sunflower seeds and peanuts in my bag. There should be some hot potato chips inside too.”

“…”

There was shock all over Mu Wanqiu’s face. Was there a thing Jiang He did not buy?

Meanwhile, Jiang He had taken another few steps before he glanced at the black panther, that was still lying on the ground. “What?” He said flatly. “Are you ready to slip away when I’m gone?”

The black panther shuddered. It struggled to get up for a while before keeping up behind Jiang He.

It could feel several broken bones because Jiang He’s beating was not light… it did not feel it when on the ground, but after walking over one kilometer, its body shuddered and it could not move in pain.

As such, the black panther couldn’t help remembering its near-death experience before—when Jiang He had jammed something down its throat, and it quickly recovered despite how grievous its wounds were.

“Bro…”

“Could you put it inside me again?”

1

“Eh?”

Jiang He was blue with shock. Are you trying to get up to something depraved?

Still, the big kitty was still the first pet he tamed and it would a pity for it to die. That was why he promptly took out an eggplant and snapped it in half.

The black panther felt its wounds heal rapidly after eating, feeling astonishment as its broken bones connected themselves… what actually is that thick, huge thing?

As a leopard that grew up in Mount Helan since it was a cub, it had never seen an eggplant.

Therefore, it felt something positive towards Jiang He, and even more fear at the same time.

The way he would start beating it up at a moment’s notice was simply terrifying!

It then spoke through spirit, “Bro, that willow tree is extremely frightening. Two powerful humans who came up the mountain before could not even win against them when they fought together…”

“Oh?”

Jiang He’s gaze twitched and he asked, “Powerful humans? How powerful?”

Nonetheless, he was worried inwardly. “According to the black panther, those two had come aiming for the willow tree. Wouldn’t it be bad if they suddenly slip out when I’m fighting the willow tree?”

Jiang He was only too familiar with that plot.

Neighbors who could not agree would always lose out a third party, and he could not afford to let anyone take advantage of him.

At that thought, Jiang He asked, “Where are those two humans now?’

He decided to meet those two men beforehand.

Of course, it would be best if he could persuade them to leave Mount Helan.