Chapter 680 Forget Me Not
Chapter 680 Forget Me Not
"I got some stains on my clothes when I was cooking, so I wanted to get change. But, when I saw Asami leave. I decided I'd go to you first."
Oh, so that's the reason why. Her thoughts break off when Yuhi walks over to the bed. He caressed her cheeks and leaned forward.
"I-I thought you were getting changed," Sumire mumbled.
"Well yeah, I was. But it's a bit hard for me to ignore you when you are like this."
"Like what?"
"You know you're giving off the 'I want you vibes' so strongly." Yuhi trailed off. "When you blush, you look even lovelier. Hey, let me tell you something, Sumire, you're the only one who has ever stirred my heart like this."
Sumire tried to avoid his gaze, but he was so close to her, so it was difficult to do so.
"You don't have to tell me."
"You're being stubborn again. Did I take time off only to have you refuse me?"
"I-I can't move my hands, remember."
Yuhi brought her fingers to his lips, and she flinched. "It's alright. I'm not that much of a beast. I was just teasing you."
"This teasing has gone too far," Sumire mumbled after Yuhi finished kissing her fingers.
"By the way, when I was looking through your composition book. I noticed a few new songs. You have enough for an album; have you tried discussing it with Hino?"
"Mmm, I have loads of new songs, and Hino and I have changed which ones to use for my single several times."
"Hino is being stingy; he should just make you release a new single and album at the same time."
Sumire sweat fell at those words. "Yuhi-san, no matter how much confidence you have in me. I can't do something that outrageous with my position."
"You may think it's crazy, but it would be a good way to promote you as an artist in our company. By releasing a single and album." Yuhi trailed off. "Besides, are you okay with keeping all these songs a secret? I thought you wanted to release your music to the rest of the world."
"I do, but I wrote so many songs in a row. Shouldn't we question whether they are good quality or not?"
"Hm? I can tell at a glance; I'm surprised you can't." Yuhi picked up her notebook that was on the bedside table. "Especially this one."
Sumire looked at the page that she titled forget me not.
(Oh, everything turns from ash to ash
Life sets its sights somewhere far in the distance
Dragging my wounded sins and pain along with it
And everything turns from dust to dust
On the day I collapse and return to the earth
I hope at least that a small flower will bloom
forget-me-not
How do I escape from the monster before my eyes?
A hero who ran away, unable to face it
Here in this world with no edge
Running here and there, arriving back at the same place.
It just repeats, and life goes on.)
She immediately tried to hide it, but it was already too late as Yuhi hummed the lyrics.
"This feels like an invasion of privacy."
Yuhi laughed, and his gaze softened as he picked up his guitar. "Hey, try to sing this. I'll play along."
"You even memorized the sheet music." Sumire sighed deeply. She supposes there is no use.
'Initially, when I wrote this song, it was shortly after Toh left her. Back then, I was already tired of everything. No matter what I do, it feels like nothing will work out.'
'I am a monster. I do not deserve happiness or love, yet a part of me still clung to it. Even if the outcome was the same.'
"I wonder if even the deep-sea fish using lungs to breathe
And the bird who can't really ride the wind
Are you out there somewhere, on a journey
Even if we don't meet
They're out there
And that's enough for me, that's enough
My body turns to ash.
My memories turn to dust.
Ending without leaving even one word to history
Even so, I aim for the distance
Even so, I search for proof
I want to know why I lived.
I want to leave something meaningful behind." Sumire sang.
If the day came when she finally hit her limit and ended her life, she wanted to leave something behind, to prove that something like her was able to survive in this world.
By the end of the song, she felt tears fall from her eyes, and Yuhi had put his guitar down. He was wiping her tears away.
"Your songs reflect your reality and your emotions. That's why I can tell, even if you write a number of songs in a short time, every song is special." Yuhi kissed her eyelids. "I forget how much you can cry. Is this a lifetime amount of tears?"
"Yuhi, you dummy," Sumire mumbled. "You did it on purpose."
"I did; you never talked to me about it after all. Why have you attempted suicide several times? You were afraid I would judge you if I found out, but even when I did, that didn't happen. But you still didn't tell me why."
"It's a bit hard to explain," Sumire mumbled. "One day, I will tell you. But I don't think this way anymore. I want to survive and live alongside you."
"I know you do, and we will live a nice long life together."
"When I was writing lyrics for this, I remembered the painful feelings I had the last few years."
She engraved those feelings so strongly into her soul. She was a coward, and yet she picked up a weapon because she wanted to get stronger. She wanted to carve her existence no matter how small it was.
"I am right beside you Sumire." Yuhi mumbled as he hugged her tightly. "You don't have to prove your existence like this anymore. You are alive, and your feelings for me are so strong."
"I wrote about a part of you in this song Yuhi. Even if we didn't meet again, even if I couldn't stay by your side, it was enough for me as long as you were living well out there."
"I had similar thoughts, even if I wasn't by your side. If you could smile, I'd be fine with it." Yuhi mumbled. "But both of us were being silly. I need you, and you need me, right?"
"I can't live without you."
"After receiving so many confessions from you, I have to admit that my poor heart is struggling to cope."
He is so silly, and yet he is her foolish idiot.