Cthulhu Gonfalon

The first customer of the amusement park was not a mortal, but a God.

“It looks pretty good,” Ville said. Ville went to the dessert shop and took a sweet as if he was a tourist here, and then went to the drink shop and took a fruit wine. He drank the wine while eating the dessert, and praised. “Very original! It’s something I haven’t seen!”

Sui Xiong floated beside and toured with him. When he listened to his praise, he could not help but smile. “Just call me ‘Oscar with originality!’” He said this, and also raised his head high, seeming mighty. However, he forgot one thing: the jellyfish’s body was almost a semicircle. Regardless of how he straightened his body, there was no difference.

“This barbecue is also good.” After a while, they came to a barbecue stall. Ville ate two sticks of meat with interest and was amazed. “Although the craft is even worse than the chef’s, this novelty is unparalleled!”

As a member of the country of gastronomy, Sui Xiong felt proud, and knew about culinary skills. With the help of holy power, the sauces that were secretly inherited by various chefs on the earth were reproduced here, and various kinds of flavored foods naturally came into being.

All the food in this playground were all in the style of the Earth. From the glasses of water on the roadside stalls to the signature dishes in the restaurants; this didn’t exist as a style of this world.

Not only that, but the various facilities of the amusement park were also entirely in the style of the Earth; every little piece carefully crafted by Sui. Although the power system was very different, both the appearance and the experience here were not different from those on the Earth.

If there was any difference, it was the workers in the playground. There might be giants, half-orcs, elves, and dwarves in a playground on Earth; but they couldn’t be real.

However, in this amusement park, the giant gatekeepers, the half-orc patrollers, the elven and half-elven servants, the dwarf porters, and the dwarf chefs in several stores, were all real. Even the dragon that was lazily lying in the corner, spewing fire to the sky from time to time was real. Oh, no—this was fake.

“Isn’t there a problem with putting a big dragon in the playground?” said Ville, pointing to the dragon, which was lying next to the rocky mountain, pretending to sleep.

“There should be no problem, it’s not a real dragon.” Sui Xiong rushed over and shouted at the red dragon which was half asleep, “Fafnir, are you okay?”

The red dragon, like a small hill, looked up at him with a pair of peachy eyes full of charm. It shook its head. “Not very good. This dress is a bit uncomfortable; I feel a little sorry to have signed a contract valid for a decade with you now.”

“Anyway, if you’re idle, you’re still idle. You can earn money by lying here and doing nothing. What’s wrong with you?” Sui Xiong said with a smile. “And it’s not like you’re wearing it all day. Take it off when you don’t work.”

The dragon lowered its head drowsily and buried its head in its paws.

“If I had known it was boring, I wouldn’t have come…” His muffled voice came out from the paws. “The damn bard said that Your Majesty said it would be the world’s most interesting playground, and attract the world’s most wealthy people; accompanied by, of course, the best hotels, casinos, and brothels in the world. And I, finally, was deceived to work here! As a believer in the God of Happiness, he is happy; but he cheated me!”

After a glimpse, Ville responded and diligently investigated by using holy power, and found it interesting.

It turned out that this man wearing a dragon-skin coat, posing as a dragon, was a legendary creature named Fafnir. It had a nickname called ‘The Big Free Strange Bird.’ Although it was a huge strange bird, it was ardent to appear as a human being, and go to all the busy cities to gamble and visit prostitutes. Every time it did that, it dropped a box of gold coins, and then went to eat, drink and play for a few days. The most famous story was that it ran to a famous brothel to ‘solely have fun’ more than once. It ate and drank and had sex for days and nights; the prostitutes could not get out of bed. After that, it laughed and changed into its original appearance, and left flying.

As a famous ‘big player’ in the world, it had suffered a great loss this time.

The bard was a high priest of Ville, who had learned from Ville that His Majesty the Void Mask was building the world’s premier playground in the Ashes Woods. So once he had chatted with Fafnir in the pub, he spoke of this.

At that time, this person and this bird were drunk. Whatever they said was bragging. In short, Fafnir was interested in this amusement park.

It had always boasted himself as the person—or rather, bird—that could play the most joyfully in the entire continent. Hearing that there was such a good place, how could he not try it? So regardless of the hardships, he flew to the Ashes Woods for thousands of miles, wanting to see if the playground was really so interesting.

Unfortunately, when it came here, the playground was not completed. The so-called ‘best hotel, best casino, best brothel,’ certainly did not exist.

Fafnir, who felt cheated, was full of anger turned from enthusiasm, and wanted to make trouble. However, it was suppressed by the iron fist of Sui Xiong, and after a warm and friendly negotiation, he eventually became an employee of the playground. The usual job was to put on a red dragon coat that was specially made by Sui to disguise the wearer as a fierce red dragon. It could be touched and looked at by tourists, and from time to time, it was also responsible for roaring or spitting fire to create an atmosphere.

“You fake it too well!” Ville could not help but admire. “You let a legendary creature pretend to be a red dragon, and that dragon skin is so realistic! I was fooled from the beginning!”

Sui Xiong laughed and was very proud.

The ability that could fool the gods was supernatural. He wondered, if he could go back to Earth, maybe he could make a living through this ability of falsification; for example, he could sell knock-off phones and pirated CDs.

No; as a literary person, he could learn from Mr. Zhang Daqian, who at his young age was a master of falsification, specifically forging various kinds of ancient paintings. He also liked to put his name in the paintings to prove it.

But no one had thought that the value of these paintings that he falsified were inferior to the authentic works. Even the counterfeit goods were better than genuine ones.

Sui Xiong believed that his ability to make fakes could be estimated to reach this level.

“To tell the truth, you can build such a magnificent playground and it’s all right. You can find so many weird recipes and it’s not very strange. What really surprises me is that you can actually gather so many wonderful people.” After some more excursion, Ville sat on the viewing platform of the amusement park’s tallest restaurant, looking around at the surrounding scenery. He smiled and said, “The most amazing thing is that these people with different personalities, and even unruly legendary creatures, are willing to listen to you and work honestly here.”

At the gate of the amusement park, Gerrard held a giant axe as a guard and showed a simple smile to the children passing by. In the office of the management office, Snowflake was yelling at a stupid half-orc. He might have done something that made her angry. In the library, Wall was holding a broom and was slowly sweeping the floor. He looked as calm as an ancient well. Beside the rocky mountain of fire, Fafnir, who was wearing a dragon-skin coat, was still murmuring and complaining about his unluckiness.

Continuing with his holy mind, he soon saw Steele at the entrance to the underground maze, who advised curious visitors to leave; then he saw Acaine, who was sitting in a medical room and compiling a mushroom guide.

“It’s nothing; just an ordinary playground,” Sui Xiong said.

“This playground is not ordinary at all!” Ville smiled meaningfully.

When he left, he promised Sui that he would ask his faithful bards to spread stories about the playground, and help attract tourists.

However, after more than a month, there were still few tourists at the amusement park.

“Why would that be?” Sui looked at the deficit report that Snowflake handed over to him and was full of wonder. “Isn’t this playground fun?”

“It’s fun,” Snowflake said. “But it’s too far away.”

“Far? Is there a problem? As a Chinese saying goes, being far away isn’t an obstacle to selling good wine! The Confederation of Mifata was also far, but there were many people going there to learn magic!”

“Learning magic is necessary; but playing in a playground is not.”

Sui Xiong was speechless, sighed, and looked at the dazzling loss, muttering, “All the supplies are self-produced; why should we lose money? Even if only one person came, there would be a net profit.”

“Don’t you think that you’re looking for such a large group of people, and you don’t need to pay people?” Snowflake said coldly. “Even your devout believers are not obliged to work for you for free!”

Sui Xiong was speechless again. He stared at the wooden board that stated all kinds of expenses. He stared at the word ‘loss,’ specially marked by Snowflake. The fierce eyes were like two sharp swords, which carved two deep grooves on the wooden board.

However, this did not change the problem; the loss was still a loss.

“We need to find a way to attract more tourists!” he said.

But what should I do?

After some thought, he decided to build a gate of transmission in the capitals of all the major countries that headed to the amusement park.

“Hey! That’s too costly!” Even as a calm giant dragon, Snowflake was startled by his crazy idea. “Do you know how much precious stuff would be needed to build a fixed gate of transmission?”

“No matter. I’ll pay it!”

“But it also costs money to transmit them here!”

He laughed three times and said, “You don’t understand! My playground has always been targeted at high-end customers. If they can afford to explore the maze in the underground city, how could they care about the transmission fee?

“I would like to add even more high-end projects, such as arranging a group of moon elf waiters for those wealthy bigwigs. The girls will wear high-split cheongsams, and wear rabbit ears on their heads. They should bow to anyone they meet; the ground should also be covered with a red carpet, from the gate of transmission to the entrance to the underground city; there should be renovation along the way to improve its leveling… guess now, how much money do I have to charge them?”

“One hundred gold coins per team?”

“Three hundred gold coins, per person!”

“Three hundred gold coins per person… that’s too much!”

“That’s what you don’t understand! Those who are willing to spend a lot of money on the transmission, of course, are willing to spend a lot of money on playing! Look at the one who’s lying on the floor and pretends to be a dragon; he came with a box of gold coins.”

For how dubious Snowflake was about it, the angry and irrational Sui Xiong completely ignored her. He waved his tentacles and made this crazy decision.