Back Then, I Adored You

“In the past, I’ve never thought about love. Now, I only think about you.”

The words were personally handwritten. Resembling Gu Yusheng, the words looked clean and handsome.

Qin Zhi’ai stared at the ribbon for some time before reaching out to grab another one.

“I was fearful of nothing and yet you were the exception.”

“I want to be the last to say goodnight to you and the first to greet you in the morning.”

“I want to share a secret with you: I love you.”

“To me, you are Qin Zhi’ai, you are little troublemaker, and you are also… the woman whom Gu Yusheng loves.”

“I wish that 50 years down the road, when I call out to Qin Zhi’ai, you will be there to answer me.”

…

As far as Qin Zhi’ai was aware, Gu Yusheng was not one to engage in sweet talk. He was reticent and had a cool personality. Even during their call in the afternoon, while his emotions had built up for a long time and she had also expected him to share his long, flowing thoughts with her, ultimately, his response had been simple and awkward: “Xiao’ai, I am completely clear of all the scandals now.”

To be honest, that was the best thing that he could have said to her; she was already very content. However, she had never expected to see from him the romantic, amorous lover’s prattle that she was seeing right now.

She had seen such grand scenes and poetic gestures on TV, in novels, and even in the news, but Qin Zhi’ai knew that this was not something that everyone would experience in their life, so she had never desired it herself. Every time she saw how female leads would be touched to tears, she would always grumble to herself about the need for such a dramatic reaction.

Now that she had personally experienced the fantasy, she finally understood that if you had never personally experienced it you would never be able to comprehend that feeling.

Tears welled up in Qin Zhi’ai’s eyes, and she pulled out another ribbon.

“To choose the object of one’s desire and to love the choice that he or she makes. The first part refers to the earlier part of my life. The latter refers to you.”

“I enjoy being alone except when I’m with you.”

“Now that I’ve set my eyes on you, I will not waver even if you plan to escape or if someone better comes along.”

“I will give you anything you desire, even if it meant leaving you.”

“My yearning heart is filled only with you. All the songs that I play on the piano were about you, and my diary is fully penned with your name.”

“The person who silently protects me in rain and shine. All along, you are the piece of luck that I yearn to grasp and keep.”

There were too many ribbons to read, much less write, and Qin Zhi’ai guessed that Gu Yusheng probably had to have help coming up with so many love notes. Most of them were probably taken from song lyrics to make up the count. There were even notes with messages like “I love you just like how rats love rice.”

Unable to contain herself any further, Qin Zhi’ai giggled and continued to read on.

When she was about to read the first few lines of lyrics for the song “Final Destination,” she saw a line that read: “Xiao’ai, I promise to write you a romantic tale with the rest of my life. The story will start from the day when I met you. I only hope that there will never be an end to it once it starts.”

What a beautiful wish it is to hope that there will never be an end to the story once it starts…

Qin Zhi’ai who had cracked up moments ago over the funny song lyrics suddenly began to tear up.

…

“The most beautiful way I can express my love is to be an exceptional human for the rest of my life because of you.”

This was the last ribbon. Compared to the others, there were four more words below the sentence: “Love of my life.”

More tears flooded out from Qin Zhi’ai’s eyes, and she looked over at the woman singing nearby.

She had coincidentally just completed her song. Holding onto the microphone, she flashed a polite and elegant smile at Qin Zhi’ai.