Am I A God?

Elizabeth’s tragic cry reverberated in Zhao Yao’s head.

“Who?”

“Who did this?!” Elizabeth growled. “Who shaved off my hair?”

Zhao Yao stood behind Elizabeth and bent down to stroke her head. He could clearly see the shaven patch of fur, leaving behind a layer of very fine fur.

Right at this moment, Roly Poly yawned as he climbed out of his bed. Surprisingly, there was also a shaven bald patch on his head, exposing a layer of black scalp.

“What happened?” Roly Poly glanced over at Elizabeth and touched his own head. “Why does it feel so windy today?”

Dust Ball did a lazy cat stretch as she got out of bed as well. Zhao Yao was stunned to see that Dust Ball’s head was shaven as well.

For a moment, the three cats with their shaven heads looked exactly like three middle-aged people suffering from hair loss problems.

It was fair to note that fur itself accounts for more than half of the cat’s appearance. Once their fur was shaven, it would be akin to a female celebrity without her make-up.

Roly Poly and Dust Ball joined Elizabeth in her tragic cries as they stood in front of the mirror and stared in disbelief at their shaven heads.

Just then, Matcha was yawning and dragging his tail on the floor as he strolled out of his bedroom.

Surprisingly, he was the only cat whose head wasn’t shaven. He immediately burst into laughter and mocked, ” Hahahaha! You guys… Hahahahaha… You guys look absolutely ugly!”

Seeing how Matcha reacted to their shaven heads with his fur still intact, Elizabeth, Roly Poly and Dust Ball gave Matcha a death stare; their dark eyes radiated with vengeance and killing intent.

“It must be your doing, silly cat!” Elizabeth’s eyes were burning with wrath but with her shaven head, she didn’t look intimidating at all.

Matcha’s smile evaporated from his face as he rolled his eyes and rebutted confidently, “Ah? Who said I did it? Do you have any proof? Do you have any evidence that proves it was the doing of George Matcha?”

Matcha’s body blinked and in a flash, he was standing beside Elizabeth as he stroked her shaven head with his paw. He continued to rub it in, “The world revolves around evidence. Look, lady, don’t jump to conclusions without evidence to support your claim. I can sue you for defamation, you know? You may speak to my lawyer afterward if you wish.”

Meanwhile, Matcha thought to himself gleefully, “With their shaven heads, their face score is at least 30 points lower than me! The Star Cat Award definitely belongs to me!”

“You guys only have yourselves to blame for being that careless. This is the reality of competition. It is cruel. In order to achieve my goals, I, George Matcha, will do whatever it takes to attain it…”

“Scum cat!” Elizabeth gave Matcha a slap on his face.

“You little f*ck…”

“Screw yourself.”

As time freeze was still on cooldown, Elizabeth delivered another slap to Matcha’s mouth.

“Hey stop it! One more time and I’ll call the police.”

“Call the police?” Elizabeth sent her paw flying towards Matcha for another slap and pounced right on him. She bit down hard on the back of his neck.

The natural instinct of a cat was to bite down on the enemy’s neck. Whenever cats fought each other, they would always aim to bite their opponent’s neck. Once they were bitten on the back of their neck, most cats would instinctively stop resisting; it was a habit taught from young by their mothers.

Upon being bitten, Matcha’s body froze and immediately started to scream in terror. “It’s a murder! She is a murderer!”

“You want to be the star cat?” Elizabeth continued to bite on Matcha’s neck while she threw a flurry of punches on his head.

“You really think you can succeed with a girly face like yours?”

*SHING!* Five razor-sharp claws sprung out of Elizabeth’s paw and grazed past Matcha’s face. “Let’s see how you can be the star cat with this face now!”

Fortunately, time freeze just went off cooldown and Matcha instantly disappeared into thin air in front of Elizabeth’s eyes. Moments later, he was seen hiding behind Zhao Yao who was a few meters away.

“Zhao Yao Zhao Yao!” Matcha tugged on Zhao Yao’s leg and cried for help. “Elizabeth is going to kill me! Send back up! Protect little Matcha now!”

Zhao Yao rolled his eyes and grabbed Matcha off the ground. He said, “You must have used time freeze to shave off their heads while they were sleeping yesterday night. Right?”

“It wasn’t me! How could it be me?!” Matcha stared at Zhao Yao with a pair of innocent eyes. “It could be some crazy supercat who barged into our house yesterday night and shaved off their heads!”

“Only a fool would believe you!” Zhao Yao threw Matcha back to Elizabeth, Roly Poly and Dust Ball who were lying in wait. It was followed by relentless screaming as the three supercats sought their revenge on Matcha. It was a complete havoc as orange fur was seen drifting about in the room.

With their heads shaven off, the cats would not feel the same as how they look with their skins.

Zhao Yao thought about this and found himself a knitted soft toy. He bought this soft toy for Matcha when he was raising him alone; he didn’t want Matcha to be lonely.

Zhao Yao proceeded to snip off all the fur on the soft toy. He went to take a look at Matcha, who was lying flat on the floor like a dead cat. Matcha was surrounded by a layer of thin orange fur around him.

Zhao Yao coughed and announced, “Alright alright, don’t overdo it and kill him. We still have to work today.”

Zhao Yao placed a patch of fur which belonged to the soft toy on Roly Poly’s head. Roly Poly glanced at it and said, “This won’t work, it’s way too sparse!”

“I guess it beats having nothing on your head.” Zhao Yao stroked his chin and continued, “Tonight’s the night, we don’t have much time. Let’s just stick to this for now.” He proceeded to attach a few extra strands of fur onto Roly Poly’s head.

He moved on to Dust Ball after settling Roly Poly’s fur. Dust Ball belonged to the Shorthair breed, hence her fur felt similar to the fur of the soft toy.

Elizabeth, however, was a tricky one. She had much longer hair than all the other cats. Coupled with her bigger head, her bald patch seemed to stand out more than the other cats.

“This…” Zhao Yao frowned as he compared Elizabeth’s fur with the fur of the soft toy.

“The fur isn’t enough, right? It’s okay, I’ll think of a solution.” Elizabeth cooly replied and proceeded to use her paw and leg to press down on Matcha. Meanwhile, she lowered her head and bit down hard on Matcha’s head fur.

*rip sound*

It was like the sound of paper tearing as Elizabeth ripped off a patch of fur off Matcha’s head.

“Meow!” Matcha cried in pain. “It’s bleeding! It’s bleeding! Stop!”

“He has to wear the green beanie anyway so it doesn’t matter if he has fur or not.” Elizabeth spat a patch of slightly bloodied fur onto Zhao Yao’s hand and asked, “Will this do?”

Translator’s Thoughts

 JTJTY97

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